Quote:
Can't you see it now?
Passenger: "Captain I was following us on my iPad coming in to land and we went way out here over this lake before coming back in to land. That doesn't make any sense. We clearly could have cut right over the city and landed on that runway right there and saved like ten minutes of time."
Captain: (long pause and studious look) "You know...you're right. Why don't I just unbutton these epaulettes right here and you can tape them on your t-shirt."
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I can hear the ding of the FA now..."A guy in first wants me to tell you that the weather in Chicago has cleared and we should be able to leave now. He checked on his iPad. He says if you need to, you can borrow it to shoot an approach down to WAAS mins..."
At which point I will come unglued, relieve the liquor cart of it's Heineken, and bid farewell with a slide deployment...