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Old 01-14-2012, 02:45 AM   #1 (permalink)
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Default Perry looking to purchase AA (Satire)

AFRICAN-AMERICAN AIRLINES|Weekly World News


DALLAS – * Tyler Perry reportedly made an offer to buy American Airlines. *They accepted. *The new airline: *African-American Airlines.

The Texas-based AMR Corporation, the parent company of American Airlines, announced that the company filed petitions for Chapter 11 reorganization in the U.S. Bankruptcy Court for the Southern District of New York, “in order to achieve a cost and debt structure that is industry competitive and thereby assure its long-term viability and ability to continue delivering a world-class travel experience for its customers.”

WWN has learned that wealthy actor-director Tyler Perry has made an attractive offer for American Airlines. *The offer, said to be near $5 billion dollars, was quickly accepted by the airline.

“Mr. Perry made a bold and brilliant move… he is the smartest mogul in the country,” said a source close to American Airlines. *”No other businessman would have the guts to try to bail out the biggest airline in the United States.”

Perry, the creator of the “Madea” character and the “House of Payne” sitcom, reportedly plans to rename American Airlines – African-American Airlines. *The new Perry run airline will be targeted to African-American passengers, but industry experts say that many white, asian and latino passengers will want to fly the airline, “just to be cool.”

Sources close to American Airlines said the sale to Perry is in the best interest of *the company and its shareholders.

Perry said he will not only be the CEO of the new airline, but he also will be the CFO, the COO, the CIO, the director of human sources and, of course, he will pilot many of the AAA flights.



American said it is operating normal flight schedules, honoring tickets and reservations, and making normal refunds and exchanges – during the transition period.

Perry reportedly said he will slowly implement new changes. *”I want every flight to be a positive experience for all passengers and I hope to turn every flight into a morality play of sorts.”

How will Perry turn a flight into a morality play? *”He hasn’t figured that out yet, but there will be a Madea character on every flight,” said Perry’s limo driver.

This will be Perry’s first airline, but sources say he plans to buy an airline every year for the next twenty years.
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Old 01-14-2012, 02:53 AM   #2 (permalink)
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For a moment I thought Rick Perry was buying AA. Whew
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Old 01-14-2012, 03:15 AM   #3 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Flyby1206 View Post
For a moment I thought Rick Perry was buying AA. Whew
That's the first thing I thought when I read the thread title. He was going in to save his Texas (flawed) crown jewel.
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