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Chuck Norris: Rules To Fly By... Chuck Norris: Rules To Fly By...
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Old 10-31-2008, 04:00 PM   #11 (permalink)
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It only takes Chuck Norris 20 minutes to watch the show 60 Minutes!
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Old 10-31-2008, 11:26 PM   #12 (permalink)
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Chuck Norris' tears cure STD's. It's too bad he never cries.
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Old 11-01-2008, 08:48 AM   #13 (permalink)
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Chuck Norris visited the Virgin Islands. Now they just call them the Islands.
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Old 11-01-2008, 09:11 AM   #14 (permalink)
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Chuck Norris counted to infinity........twice!
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Thank God we don't get as much government as we pay for!
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Old 11-01-2008, 11:11 AM   #15 (permalink)
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Chuck Norris recently had the idea to sell his urine as a canned beverage. We know this beverage as Red Bull.
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Old 11-01-2008, 07:37 PM   #16 (permalink)
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Chuck Norris can squawk 9988
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Old 11-01-2008, 07:45 PM   #17 (permalink)
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Chuck Norris doesn't sleep...he waits.

Chuck Norris doesn't teabag....he potato sacks.

Chuck Norris doesn't jump. He repels the earth 3 feet.
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Old 11-01-2008, 09:15 PM   #18 (permalink)
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Some kids **** their name in the snow. Chuck Norris can **** his name into concrete.

Chuck Norris can speak braille.

Chuck Norris puts the "laughter" in "manslaughter".

Chuck Norris can do a wheelie on a unicycle.

Chuck Norris can delete the Recycling Bin.
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Old 11-01-2008, 11:00 PM   #19 (permalink)
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Apple pays Chuck Norris 99 cents every time he listens to a song.

Chuck Norris destroyed the periodic table, because he only recognizes the element of surprise.

Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird.

Chuck Norris frequently donates blood to the Red Cross. Just never his own.

The chief export of Chuck Norris is pain.
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Old 11-01-2008, 11:03 PM   #20 (permalink)
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-Chuck Norris does not own a microwave or oven because revenge is a dish best served cold

-Chuck Norris does not sleep he waits

-Chuck Norris once roundhouse kicked so fast that his foot traveled back into time and hit Amelia Earhart's plane
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