Clarification
I appreciate all of your replies. My goal was to remove as much emotion from the decision as possible...A no-regrets mentality, you know. My CC put it best the other day when he asked if I have gotten all I wanted from the AF. Well, I have. With any luck, I'll get hired as a TR and the interview call in the next 8 months. We think it's time for some roots.
In terms of the military being a calling, that's why I want to go in the Reserves. I enjoy military flying. It's the rest of the nonsense and constant competition that's killing me. I fell 1000% better now that I turned down an assignment and a pointless IDE competition.
Lastly, the spreadsheet may be garbage today but it distilled the conversation to QOL. The numbers are basically a wash (worst case scenario) with the pilot bonus and reserve retirement. The deal breaker was the deployment grinder and the constantly increasing workload for a slim chance of promotion beyond O-5. Thanks again. Your input was more valuable than you may know.