Cadet pilot dilemma - pilots please help!
#31
On Reserve
Thread Starter
Joined APC: Sep 2017
Posts: 14
First) - Western wives might have different mindset than Asian apparently do.
Second) - your first years will have little days off.
Third and most important) - your marriage will end in divorce from your absences. For FAA certs, what I've seen in 16 months wway from home (or longer). The Chinese ab initio students that I ttrained do not get to possess their actual FAA certificates, the company holds them as soon as they are mailed by the FAA. They do have their paper temps, but they get local certicates to fly.
You will not fly into the US without an FAA certificate.
If you ARE AS WEALTHY AS YOU SAY, then get a visa, come here to train and bring your wife while becoming naturalized citizen; after you acquire your com multi with some turbine time you can apply for job there.
Either way, you cannot run your business while you are in an ab inito training environment, as it is very rigorous and difficult.
Second) - your first years will have little days off.
Third and most important) - your marriage will end in divorce from your absences. For FAA certs, what I've seen in 16 months wway from home (or longer). The Chinese ab initio students that I ttrained do not get to possess their actual FAA certificates, the company holds them as soon as they are mailed by the FAA. They do have their paper temps, but they get local certicates to fly.
You will not fly into the US without an FAA certificate.
If you ARE AS WEALTHY AS YOU SAY, then get a visa, come here to train and bring your wife while becoming naturalized citizen; after you acquire your com multi with some turbine time you can apply for job there.
Either way, you cannot run your business while you are in an ab inito training environment, as it is very rigorous and difficult.
#32
Gets Weekends Off
Joined APC: Jun 2016
Position: A350 CA
Posts: 295
This career is definately not for you. You won't last or make it past training. You must be passionate about flying to be successful, atleast in 99% of the cases. Or just super smart with an ability of fly. Don't waste your time. Move on to something more suitable or get rid of the wife.
#33
Gets Weekends Off
Joined APC: Aug 2012
Posts: 456
First) - Western wives might have different mindset than Asian apparently do.
Second) - your first years will have little days off.
Third and most important) - your marriage will end in divorce from your absences. For FAA certs, what I've seen in 16 months wway from home (or longer). The Chinese ab initio students that I ttrained do not get to possess their actual FAA certificates, the company holds them as soon as they are mailed by the FAA. They do have their paper temps, but they get local certicates to fly.
You will not fly into the US without an FAA certificate.
If you ARE AS WEALTHY AS YOU SAY, then get a visa, come here to train and bring your wife while becoming naturalized citizen; after you acquire your com multi with some turbine time you can apply for job there.
Either way, you cannot run your business while you are in an ab inito training environment, as it is very rigorous and difficult.
Second) - your first years will have little days off.
Third and most important) - your marriage will end in divorce from your absences. For FAA certs, what I've seen in 16 months wway from home (or longer). The Chinese ab initio students that I ttrained do not get to possess their actual FAA certificates, the company holds them as soon as they are mailed by the FAA. They do have their paper temps, but they get local certicates to fly.
You will not fly into the US without an FAA certificate.
If you ARE AS WEALTHY AS YOU SAY, then get a visa, come here to train and bring your wife while becoming naturalized citizen; after you acquire your com multi with some turbine time you can apply for job there.
Either way, you cannot run your business while you are in an ab inito training environment, as it is very rigorous and difficult.
What you said about your wife is almost exactly word for word what I would have said years ago about my ex, so if you're willing accept the possibility of trading your wife for this job, then do it. It's a balance only you know. My wife now is incredible and in no way would I ever utter words close to those about her.
#34
On Reserve
Thread Starter
Joined APC: Sep 2017
Posts: 14
To pile on to the marriage piece of this, I and many others can tell you from experience. Your wife sounds like someone I know. She was uprooted, moved far away from any family or friends with no support system and hated being alone. Always told that it would get better. That's my ex wife.
What you said about your wife is almost exactly word for word what I would have said years ago about my ex, so if you're willing accept the possibility of trading your wife for this job, then do it. It's a balance only you know. My wife now is incredible and in no way would I ever utter words close to those about her.
What you said about your wife is almost exactly word for word what I would have said years ago about my ex, so if you're willing accept the possibility of trading your wife for this job, then do it. It's a balance only you know. My wife now is incredible and in no way would I ever utter words close to those about her.
I read that in the US and many other countries, pilots usually have to pay for their own training, and go through the regional-> major route. However for this ab initio program at my local carrier, they are a major already (voted top 5 airline in the world many years in a row), and they pay for the training, and promises a job. Sounds like a very good job opportunity for the long-term.
Sigh, it's really confusing!
#35
Gets Weekends Off
Joined APC: Nov 2011
Position: Admiral
Posts: 726
There will be no "getting used to it" for your wife. Either she is onboard with the lifestyle (because it will be a lifestyle for both of you) or she isn't. And even if she in onboard with the pilot wife lifestyle it can be difficult at times. Take my schedule for this month... I've only been able to spend 5 full days at home. During this time my wife had to evacuate our home with our 15 month old son along with our cat and dog, and drive 15 hours all alone because of a hurricane. Sure it was an extreme situation, but when I'm not home (and even when I am home) she is the boss of the house and has to be both mom and dad all at the same time with little to no input from me.
And that's just dealing with the spousal issues...
You'll find any ab initio tough if you don't have a real passion for flying. It can be a great career if you do have the passion, but it seems like you might be lacking what it takes. Tried and true advice would be to get your PPL first just to see if it's something you enjoy doing. Otherwise it may be a waste of time. If you find that you do like it, you might want to move back to the States in order for you to have even the slimmer of a chance of a successful marriage. While you pay for your own training here, you also won't be beholden to a bond forever.
And that's just dealing with the spousal issues...
You'll find any ab initio tough if you don't have a real passion for flying. It can be a great career if you do have the passion, but it seems like you might be lacking what it takes. Tried and true advice would be to get your PPL first just to see if it's something you enjoy doing. Otherwise it may be a waste of time. If you find that you do like it, you might want to move back to the States in order for you to have even the slimmer of a chance of a successful marriage. While you pay for your own training here, you also won't be beholden to a bond forever.
#36
Gets Weekends Off
Joined APC: Aug 2012
Posts: 456
Hi there! I'm sorry for probing, but did you ex-wife get used to it and settle down eventually? My wife has settled down in my country here in Singapore (we moved back here almost 4 years ago). We visit her family a few times a year and they come to visit once every year (2 hrs flight from Singapore). The thing is, my wife isn't the independent type who loves making new friends, etc. We're happy together and I love her very much, and I don't want to trade her for anything in the world honestly. Money is not really an issue for us too.
#37
On Reserve
Thread Starter
Joined APC: Sep 2017
Posts: 14
She wouldn't be an ex wife if she did settle in. She had a job, made a few friends, etc., but hardly settled in the sense I could be comfortable leaving her for a week at a time and knowing she would be ok mentally and emotionally. I'm telling you, you sound like me 6-9 years ago.
Didn't you feel guilty/bad about having to leave her for days at a time, while she's all alone, feeling sad, and wondering what you're doing? Just trying to get into your frame of mind 6-9 years ago, so I can learn from your mistakes/lessons/experience.
#38
Gets Weekends Off
Joined APC: Oct 2015
Position: Gear slinger
Posts: 2,885
Hi there! I'm sorry for probing, but did you ex-wife get used to it and settle down eventually? My wife has settled down in my country here in Singapore (we moved back here almost 4 years ago). We visit her family a few times a year and they come to visit once every year (2 hrs flight from Singapore). The thing is, my wife isn't the independent type who loves making new friends, etc. We're happy together and I love her very much, and I don't want to trade her for anything in the world honestly. Money is not really an issue for us too.
I read that in the US and many other countries, pilots usually have to pay for their own training, and go through the regional-> major route. However for this ab initio program at my local carrier, they are a major already (voted top 5 airline in the world many years in a row), and they pay for the training, and promises a job. Sounds like a very good job opportunity for the long-term.
Sigh, it's really confusing!
I read that in the US and many other countries, pilots usually have to pay for their own training, and go through the regional-> major route. However for this ab initio program at my local carrier, they are a major already (voted top 5 airline in the world many years in a row), and they pay for the training, and promises a job. Sounds like a very good job opportunity for the long-term.
Sigh, it's really confusing!
#39
This does not sound like something you should do.
She will be sitting home miserable, you will be out flying to different cities and then sitting in hotels...knowing your wife is home miserable and there is nothing you can do about it....week after week after week.
If she was saying "go follow your dream to become a pilot because I love you and want to see you happy and successful" , that would be a different story but she is not saying that and as you said, this is not your dream job.
She will be sitting home miserable, you will be out flying to different cities and then sitting in hotels...knowing your wife is home miserable and there is nothing you can do about it....week after week after week.
If she was saying "go follow your dream to become a pilot because I love you and want to see you happy and successful" , that would be a different story but she is not saying that and as you said, this is not your dream job.
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