Divorce Lawyer Northside Atlanta
#31
Unfortunately I have already witnessed the influence of friends. To them it’s a great drama they get to be a part of but aren’t affected by. Mediation would be great but she is digging in her heels and going scorched earth so I don’t think it’s an option. So far any generosity has not been reciprocated. As somebody earlier said I need to start hardening my heart.
Hang in there man. There are a lot of folks pulling for you, and the resources are there if you need them.
#32
Been there, done that in my late 20s. Military career completely derailed by accusations from the ex.
Cover your own ass as far as making sure you cannot be accused of any impropriety. Or domestic crimes.
You are "convicted" with a word in todays legal environs.
She has had months to prepare. She's been thinking about it for months if she filed.
You are waking up on December 8th, 1941 wondering WTF just happened, but she knew it was coming, and what's coming next.
Fully accept the children can and likely WILL be used as a weapon against you. Custody, with this job is gonna be an uphill battle, especially if she is a stay at home mom or has a normal 9-5.
You will be portrayed as the evil moustache twirling manipulator, who is banging FAs half you age, while she slaved away at home raising your children.
And yes, she is going to want money. All of it. Will settle for most of it.
Even if she didn't start that way, a lot of devils will be whispering in her ear. Hell, I had a loudmouth inlaw, not knowing I was home, tell the current wife (2.0) that "your husband just made captain.. you will be rich if you divorce him" while I was in the next room (truck was out in the back garage, she thought I was on a trip, I was just in my office, ignoring her and hoping she wouldn't realize I'm home)
Cover your own ass as far as making sure you cannot be accused of any impropriety. Or domestic crimes.
You are "convicted" with a word in todays legal environs.
She has had months to prepare. She's been thinking about it for months if she filed.
You are waking up on December 8th, 1941 wondering WTF just happened, but she knew it was coming, and what's coming next.
Fully accept the children can and likely WILL be used as a weapon against you. Custody, with this job is gonna be an uphill battle, especially if she is a stay at home mom or has a normal 9-5.
You will be portrayed as the evil moustache twirling manipulator, who is banging FAs half you age, while she slaved away at home raising your children.
And yes, she is going to want money. All of it. Will settle for most of it.
Even if she didn't start that way, a lot of devils will be whispering in her ear. Hell, I had a loudmouth inlaw, not knowing I was home, tell the current wife (2.0) that "your husband just made captain.. you will be rich if you divorce him" while I was in the next room (truck was out in the back garage, she thought I was on a trip, I was just in my office, ignoring her and hoping she wouldn't realize I'm home)
#33
Gets Weekends Off
Joined APC: Apr 2010
Position: B737NG-B
Posts: 203
I went through a divorce 5 years ago. The worst year of my life, but it gets better, much better.
Remember the following.
Women love to fight. Do not engage them in any arguments.
Communicate only via email or text. So it's all recorded.
Spend as much time as possible with your kids.
Put as much detail in your decree about kids as you can. Especially with your variable schedule, I put in that I notify her by the 23rd of my days that I get to have the kids. I was able to get 10 days per month plus holidays and off school breaks. Women will use the kids to manipulate you.
Don't apologize for anything. If you do, you will be a doormat.
She is about to learn that her lifestyle will change, money will be an issue going forward. Not your problem anymore, don't give any extra.
She will have to sleep with a few dirtbags to find out that what she had was actually pretty good , that's unfortunate but it is what it is, so, don't lose your ****.
Again, spend as much time with you kids. Give it about a year, your life will be awesome. I promise.
Good luck, you are now in the majority of delta pilots.
Remember the following.
Women love to fight. Do not engage them in any arguments.
Communicate only via email or text. So it's all recorded.
Spend as much time as possible with your kids.
Put as much detail in your decree about kids as you can. Especially with your variable schedule, I put in that I notify her by the 23rd of my days that I get to have the kids. I was able to get 10 days per month plus holidays and off school breaks. Women will use the kids to manipulate you.
Don't apologize for anything. If you do, you will be a doormat.
She is about to learn that her lifestyle will change, money will be an issue going forward. Not your problem anymore, don't give any extra.
She will have to sleep with a few dirtbags to find out that what she had was actually pretty good , that's unfortunate but it is what it is, so, don't lose your ****.
Again, spend as much time with you kids. Give it about a year, your life will be awesome. I promise.
Good luck, you are now in the majority of delta pilots.
#34
Gets Weekends Off
Joined APC: Dec 2009
Position: Capt
Posts: 2,023
As one said, people love drama if it’s safe with no personal consequences.....
join this !!!!! Child Custody and Divorce Forum ? Index page
tons if great questions, great advice from folks who have lived it. Will give you straight answers, some of which you won’t like. It was a game changer for me on how I approach her and it paid off huge.... biggest takeaway, don’t engage and radio silence.....
BTW, I asked for and got joint custody, kids at my place everyday I was off. Gave her my next month schedule by the 20th. She married a pilot and knew the schedule..lived kinda close so could still go to school from my house. Have own clothes at your house, avoid that hassle.....
join this !!!!! Child Custody and Divorce Forum ? Index page
tons if great questions, great advice from folks who have lived it. Will give you straight answers, some of which you won’t like. It was a game changer for me on how I approach her and it paid off huge.... biggest takeaway, don’t engage and radio silence.....
BTW, I asked for and got joint custody, kids at my place everyday I was off. Gave her my next month schedule by the 20th. She married a pilot and knew the schedule..lived kinda close so could still go to school from my house. Have own clothes at your house, avoid that hassle.....
#35
75 most of the time
Thread Starter
Joined APC: Apr 2009
Position: 7ER B
Posts: 266
As one said, people love drama if it’s safe with no personal consequences.....
join this !!!!! Child Custody and Divorce Forum ? Index page
tons if great questions, great advice from folks who have lived it. Will give you straight answers, some of which you won’t like. It was a game changer for me on how I approach her and it paid off huge.... biggest takeaway, don’t engage and radio silence.....
BTW, I asked for and got joint custody, kids at my place everyday I was off. Gave her my next month schedule by the 20th. She married a pilot and knew the schedule..lived kinda close so could still go to school from my house. Have own clothes at your house, avoid that hassle.....
join this !!!!! Child Custody and Divorce Forum ? Index page
tons if great questions, great advice from folks who have lived it. Will give you straight answers, some of which you won’t like. It was a game changer for me on how I approach her and it paid off huge.... biggest takeaway, don’t engage and radio silence.....
BTW, I asked for and got joint custody, kids at my place everyday I was off. Gave her my next month schedule by the 20th. She married a pilot and knew the schedule..lived kinda close so could still go to school from my house. Have own clothes at your house, avoid that hassle.....
radio silence it is
#36
75 most of the time
Thread Starter
Joined APC: Apr 2009
Position: 7ER B
Posts: 266
I went through a divorce 5 years ago. The worst year of my life, but it gets better, much better.
Remember the following.
Women love to fight. Do not engage them in any arguments.
Communicate only via email or text. So it's all recorded.
Spend as much time as possible with your kids.
Put as much detail in your decree about kids as you can. Especially with your variable schedule, I put in that I notify her by the 23rd of my days that I get to have the kids. I was able to get 10 days per month plus holidays and off school breaks. Women will use the kids to manipulate you.
Don't apologize for anything. If you do, you will be a doormat.
She is about to learn that her lifestyle will change, money will be an issue going forward. Not your problem anymore, don't give any extra.
She will have to sleep with a few dirtbags to find out that what she had was actually pretty good , that's unfortunate but it is what it is, so, don't lose your ****.
Again, spend as much time with you kids. Give it about a year, your life will be awesome. I promise.
Good luck, you are now in the majority of delta pilots.
Remember the following.
Women love to fight. Do not engage them in any arguments.
Communicate only via email or text. So it's all recorded.
Spend as much time as possible with your kids.
Put as much detail in your decree about kids as you can. Especially with your variable schedule, I put in that I notify her by the 23rd of my days that I get to have the kids. I was able to get 10 days per month plus holidays and off school breaks. Women will use the kids to manipulate you.
Don't apologize for anything. If you do, you will be a doormat.
She is about to learn that her lifestyle will change, money will be an issue going forward. Not your problem anymore, don't give any extra.
She will have to sleep with a few dirtbags to find out that what she had was actually pretty good , that's unfortunate but it is what it is, so, don't lose your ****.
Again, spend as much time with you kids. Give it about a year, your life will be awesome. I promise.
Good luck, you are now in the majority of delta pilots.
Lifestyle is going to be a big change. House, vacations and budget etc. I am pretty sure by perusing divorce everything was going to stay the exact same for her just with me gone.
#37
one piece of advice I can offer as a friend who as seen the big D happen to a lot of friends...surround yourself with friends, family, and people you like. Get that network solidified. When you're down in the dumps, you need people more than ever. 2020 has already been a dumpster in that regard; you need it more than ever. Reach out.
#38
Sorry you’re having to go through this. Divorce sucks. This book was recommended to me by a friend who’s ex turned his kids against him. I found it helpful. Best of luck to you.
Divorce Poison
Divorce Poison
#39
On Reserve
Joined APC: Oct 2019
Posts: 15
She is already using the kids as pawns. I am trying to spend as much time with them as possible and she is not being easy about it.
Lifestyle is going to be a big change. House, vacations and budget etc. I am pretty sure by perusing divorce everything was going to stay the exact same for her just with me gone.
Lifestyle is going to be a big change. House, vacations and budget etc. I am pretty sure by perusing divorce everything was going to stay the exact same for her just with me gone.
#40
Gets Weekends Off
Joined APC: Dec 2008
Position: NYC ER
Posts: 470
I went through mediation instead of two divorce lawyers, that will save tons of money, see if there is anyway you an do that.
Protect yourself, use email or written communication. Try not to get emotional (near impossible I know)
Focus on the kids, what’s best for them.
You’ll get through this. Take care of yourself too...
Protect yourself, use email or written communication. Try not to get emotional (near impossible I know)
Focus on the kids, what’s best for them.
You’ll get through this. Take care of yourself too...
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