So I totally messed up the greatest thing for me...
 

So my former fiance told me today that she felt like she was being taken for granted...let me tell you guys...if you have a great girl like her don't let her go. You really don't know how good you have it until she's gone. I miss her terribly and would do anything to get her back. Like I said, don't let a good thing go.
...From experience.
-MJ

I am truly sorry for you, and hope you get her back, but ...

you really need to sober up and get some sleep before posting. In the old days we wrote letters, then after we read them while sober we could tear them up. No such luck here ... :)

Care to elaborate on that, or is that really it? Women say a lot of things that don't mean anything anyways. You might've just saved yourself from years of agony too. My wife went through a phase after about the first year where I was thinking about dropping her, but finally she "stabilized" and is happy now. Transition periods are tough.

ding! well spoken.

Don't worry about it too much. Chicks tend to like adventuresome guys up until the point where they realize that your lifestyle will take you all over the map.

If you were an accountant and home every night, she would have stuck with you...for about 25 years, then she would have run off with a biker :rolleyes:

There are a few good ones out there...the acid test is will she follow somewhere WITHOUT being married first. If so, she probably has that independent streak she'll need when you're on the road.

MJ:

Sorry for your lost, however, maybe this may just be a good thing. Only time and serious reflection will tell. You may have been set free of some type of bondage or yoke that may not have come to fruition a couple of years from now.

I would encourage you to continue to get rid of the "fig leaves" in your life, both spiritual & physical, and remain transparent.

"And ye shall know the truth and the truth will set you free".



All the best.




atp

Thanks for the words guys. Yea, drunk posting at 3 am is probably never a good thing. We'll see how it goes from here.
-MJ

Hope everything works out for you. Chin up friend.

"Love is a madness; if thwarted it develops fast."

"When you fish for love, bait with your heart, not your brain."

Mark Twain

It's much cheaper for them to break up with you before tying the knot and having rug rats.

If you are dead set on it, never too late for a second chance!:)

MJ, stay strong man. I was in your boat about eight years ago. Two weeks from getting married by Elvis in Vegas... no, really, I'm serious. Anyway, I messed up and we were off and on for about six months before finally splitting seven years ago. At first I thought I couldn't go on, but I just kept thinking it would all work out in the end. It did.

When you get a little older and start looking back at all the bad things that happend in your life you begin to realize that those "bad" things actually guided you to where you are really suppose to wind up. I've got a beautiful wife and daughter now and I wouldn't change a thing in my past for fear of not being with them today.

Now I look back at all those saki bombers and getting groped on the stage at Lollipops in Daytona by every girl in the joint and laugh; it all turned out great.

Good Advice

Sorry you're going thru that. It definitely sucks. But take comfort in this:

What's better than a girlfriend?.....a NEW girlfriend!!!! Best of luck to you!!!

I've had I-love-you-but-won't-follow-you-on-the-road separations happen repeatedly throughout my life. I have given up trying to find anyone who will follow me, and these days with equality of sexes careerwise why should they. My former loves are all still in the towns I left them in, and probably happier that way although I wonder from time to time if they are.

Hey Man,
Breakups always suck. I just broke up with my fiance a few weeks back as well. It was for the best- we were just heading in different directions. It hurts a bit at first, then gets better.
That's what they make beer for right?
-ArchAngel

Two things happen when you can't make it work with the opposite sex: you either get God or you get used to being single all the time. I actually am getting pretty used to it now. It's been a year since the last one left and I am "happy" by and large. I won't say it's what I want for myself because it's not; no man is an island unto himself, but things go on okay. The real question is what does a person actually need in life to be happy.

unfortunately...aviation and divorce go together like peas and carrots.... Personally I have been married 24 years since before I went to military flight school..... rare indeed.

I about choked on my curry when I read this. :D Not QUITE what Mr. Donne meant - but not a bad philosophy at all. At least you beat the great man in the brevity department. :)

John Donne, Meditation XVII: No Man Is An Island


HercDriver130:
And as Confucius said: "Woman who cook carrots and peas in same pot ... VERY unsanitary! :eek:


Life will go on - with or without her. Hang in there!

A pilot and single now??? Go play son.!

Agreed. If you can jumpseat on Delta may I suggest a Kiev holiday. Here is a sample of what grows over there. :D

Mail Order Brides service: Date perfect Russian Women at Anastasia International now!

HAH! Most of those gals are "working" in Dubai. Further than Kiev (from your direction), but a bit warmer. :D

mjarosz ... I feel for ya brother!!

I don't know how much it would suck if my gal left me ... but I haven't written the possibility off it yet unfortunately. She really wants a commitment, but me being 23 and young at heart am not ready for that yet and I honestly don't know how much longer she is going to wait before she kicks me to the curb. She's graduating in May to become a teacher and keeps telling me she wants to get a job where I am going to be, but I still have yet to figure out just where that is, haha. Oh, and she refuses to live with me before we're engaged .. which just adds to the mess of poo. We are both just getting tired of the whole long distance BS.

Anyway, chin up bud! You'll find the girl that's right for you, or if it's meant to be, you'll find her again!

Has anyone stopped to think that mabye she called it off simply because they weren't right for each other and that it had nothing to do with his career? I know that's how it was for me...my ex was an airline pilot and I called it off because we weren't right for each other, not because of my ex's career (we're both pilots) or seperation issues.
MJ- No worries man. It'll get better. You'll find the one who's truly right for you (regardless of your career).
-ArchAngel

No joke, I just talked a friend down from near suicide yesterday. The problem? His girlfriend (and she is hot) stopped text messaging him for about 10 hours. No, I'm not kidding.

I kept telling him to relax and everything would be ok. Her last text message said "I need something different, so I'm going to go out with other friends tonight".

The reality was, she went out with some old girlfriends and accidentally left her cell phone at home. Mean while, the combination of her "ignoring" him and the obscure last message had him on the verge of doing something stupid.

He said, she texts almost 5000 texts a month .. and she's not texted me in 10 hours .. OMG I'm screwed.

Our younger generation has some serious issues.

-Fatty

Gee, we've got quite a lonely hearts column going on here.:D The OP is probably married with kids by now.

152, You are WAY too young to even THINK about a commitment. Period. No comment on your girl's feelings. None needed.

:confused: Young, period. Any "younger at heart" and you'll be underage!

KC10 Fatboy:
KC, I'm not surprised. If you saw these Indian kids on their Blackberrys you wouldn't believe it, and I'm sure it's the same way back home. Incredible.

rotorhead "Anne Landers" 1026

Help!
 

Dear Rotorhead Landers,

Every time I see this thread get refreshed, my heart breaks all over again.
It's a reminder of what I've lost, gained, lost, lost, and gained, and then lost in my relationships.
I'm a divorced, unemployed male floatplane pilot approaching forty years old. I'm tall and thin, but have a few extra pounds around my middle. Probably about 35 to 60 extra pounds, I'm not sure. I am in pretty good shape though as I can run 2 miles in less than about an hour as long as the terrain is pretty flat. I can also do at least 15 push-ups if the mood strikes me. Some women have described me as handsome, but most of those women had substance abuse problems. I have a pretty decent wardrobe consisting of Army surplus clothing, Carhartts, and a hell of a lot of baseball caps.
I'm a caring, somewhat educated, mostly loyal, guy. A guy who loves walks on the beach during the off season, fast cars, fast women, slow airplanes, and the sound of a snooze button being pushed at 11:30 am.
I'm looking for a 28 to 28 and a half year old redhead with a killer bod, who likes the same things as me, and has a stable, well paying job that allows her to move to random parts of the country for 3 to 9 months at a time. It would also be helpful if she has a vehicle, preferably a large 4 wheel drive pickup, and can cook really good food. And has Tivo. And is really affectionate.
Can you help me? What am I doing wrong?

Sincerely, Lovelorn Trout on APCF

Deat Mr. Trout:

Tough, tough. Your first shot would be to contact the girlfriends of the OP and KC10's friend. They are at least available, or soon will be for one reason or another. See if they're redheads. Odds are less than fifty-fifty overall, but you might luck out. Kinda like my "hit-the-lottery" retirement plan.

If not, I'm afraid I don't have an elegant solution for you. I'd suggest you give up on the Tivo and truck (unless you find a job - then buy 'em yourself). Find a female Irish Setter. Four years old would meet your age specs. She'd be employable as a retriever so she'd bring in some income. I know of no girl under the age of forty who can cook. It's a lost art to them. Irish setters are second to none in the affection department, are loyal to a fault, and will take out your ex-wife in a heartbeat if she's stupid enough to come knocking (you asked for a "killer bod" - this is the best I can do).

You're doing nothing wrong. You're younger, better looking, and in better shape than I am. If both those girls are redheads, send one to me. Don't send the setter, though. I like dogs too much to bring one over here.

Seriously, I'm sorry you're unemployed and hope you find something to your liking soon.

Sincerely,

rotorhead Anne

Well, that's what I keep telling her is that I'm simply not there yet ... whilst apparently she's been there for almost a year now ... I still have yet to figure out just out she got there so damn quickly, lol. I can't wrap my head around the whole marriage thing right now. Not to mention I'm still trying to get into a stable financial situation at the moment so I can actually live on my own, haha.

BTW, nice touch on the "any younger and you'd be underage" comment. That one made me laugh.

Wow guys...this is still being talked about quite a while later. I do have to say that although I was devistated for the first 36 hrs I did come to realize that it was for the best. To be honest I really did not want to get married...if any of you can imagine the George/Susan thing from Seinfeld then you'll know what it's about.
But with her not understanding what the lifestyle of an airline pilot is like...that is completely false. In fact, she is currently a CFI and is
(was:confused:) in my airline's hiring pool. So you really can't blame the breakup on the airline lifestyle.
Once again thanks for the words but now I am OK with the whole thing. PS. It is indeed pretty awesome to be single again.

-MJ
Glad to see you're doing better. I agree with you- It's pretty awesome to be single again!
Live it up! :)
-ArchAngel

and remember, if it floats f---s or flys, it is cheaper to rent....:rolleyes:

One day you will thank your lucky stars that you are still single....my take on it.

Very well put. Got a giggle from it.
-ArchAngel

"Love is the illusion that there is actually a difference between one woman and all the rest!"

Not my words, but I've agreed with them often. :cool:

Take that previous advice with a grain of salt. I'm 24, just recently married... everything has been amazing. We've been around the world together... whatever I do, she completely supports and is completely faithful to our future. We did live together 3 years prior... which certainly helps iron out a few issues better.... but sharing experiences with someone in life is a great privilege. Financially things haven't really changed, she works.. I work... we don't have kids...life is good.

-There is really no such thing as truly being financially stable-

to each their own

The History of what a man wants
 

When I was 20, all I wanted was a hottie with big cans, so I got one and it was good for a while, but I soon realized she wasnt too bright so we broke up at 30 because I wanted an intellectual....so we divorced..

So at 30 I found me an intellectual, but by age forty we grew apart, I realized she was too needy, and she decided she was too smart for me, so I decided I needed an independant women.........we divorced...

So at 40 I found the one that was independent, but over a period of five years of marriage, she became so independant she realized she didnt need me around, so she divorced me....

Now at age 45 sitting on the golf course reflecting on life and relationships, I realize all I really want is a "hottie with big cans"....

ITS THE CYCLE OF LIFE.....and dont go getting offended people its a joke meant to make light of the hardships that all relationships face....lol:D

Dude is this you?

YouTube - Bedazzled - Most Sensitive Man Wish

HA!

Unfortunately you're not playing - you're caddying. You need to pick up extra bucks for all those alimony payments. :D

It sounds as though you are one of the lucky few who perhaps can make it work getting married young.
I personally still can't believe I was going to get married at 23. Now that I look back, I realize it was silly to think that we (my ex and I) could have made it work being so young. We're just two totally different people now than we were when we started dating. Guess that's how it goes.
Best of luck to you :rolleyes:
-ArchAngel

:eek:...................