Airline Pilot Central Forums - Anybody else fly with this Guy?

Know this guy?
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My Life as a Pilot

22 years old: Graduated from college. Go to military flight school. Become hot
shot fighter pilot. Get married.

25 years old: Have 1st kid. Now hotshot fighter jock getting shot at in war.
Just want to get back to USA/Canada in one piece. Get back to USA/Canada as
primary flight instructor pilot. Get bored. Volunteer for war again.

29 years old: Get back from war all tuckered out. Wants out of military.

30 years old: Join airline. World is your oyster.

31 years old: Buy flashy car, house and lots of toys. Get over the military
poverty feeling.

32 years old: Divorce boring 1st wife. Pay child support and maintenance.
Drink lots of booze and screw around while looking for2nd wife.

33 years old: Furloughed.. Join military Reserve unit and fly for fun. Repeat
above for a few more years.

35 years old: Airline recall. More screwing around but looking forward to a
good marriage and settling down.

36 years old: Marry young spunky 25 year old flight attendant.

37 years old: Buy another house. Gave first one to first wife.

38 years old: Give in to second wife to have more kids. Father again. Wife
concerned about "risky" military Reserve flying so you resign commission.

39 years old: Now a captain. Hooray! Upgrade house, buy boat, small single
engine airplane and even flashier cars.

42 years old: 2nd wife runs off with wealthy investment banker but still
wants to share house (100%).

43 years old: Settle with wife #2 and resolve to stay away from women
forever. Seek a position as a check Captain for 10% pay override to pay
mounting bills. Move into 1 bedroom apartment with window air conditioners.

44 years old: Company resizes and you're returned to copilot status. 25% pay
cut. Become simulator instructor for 10% override pay.

49 years old: Captain again. Move into 2-bedroom luxury apartment with central
air conditioning

50 years old: Meet sexy Danish model on International trip. She loves you and
says you are very "beeeeg!"

51 years old: Marry sexy Danish model for wife #3. Buy big house, boat, twin
engine airplane and upgrade cars.

52 years old: Sexy model wants kids (not again). Resolve to get vasectomy.

54 years old: Try to talk wife out of kids, but presto, she's pregnant. She
says she got sick after taking the pill. Accident, sorry, won't happen again

55 years old: Father of triplets.

56 years old: Wife #3 wants very big house, bigger boat and very flashy cars
"worried" about your private flying and wants you to sell twin engine airplane.
You give in. You buy a motorcycle and join motorcycle club.

57 years old: Make rash investments to try and have enough money for
retirement.

59 years old: Lose money on rash investment and get audited by the IRS. You
have to fly 100 International night trips just to keep up with child support
and alimony to wife #1 and #2.

60 years old: Wife #3 (sexy model) says you're too damned old and no fun. She
leaves. She takes most of your assets. You're forced to retire due to Age 60
rule. No money left.

61 years old: Now Captain on a non-schedule South American 727 freight
outfit and living in a non-air conditioned studio apartment directly underneath
the final approach to runway 9 at Miami Int'l. You have interesting" Hispanic
neighbors who ask you if you've ever flown DC-3's.

65 years old: Lose FAA medical and get job as sim instructor. Don't look
forward to years of getting up at 2 AM for 3 AM sim in every God-forsaken town
you train in due to the fact your carrier can find cheap, off-hours sim time at
various Brand X Airlines.

70 years old: Hotel alarm clock set by previous FedEx crewmember goes off at
1:0 0 AM. Have heart attack and die with smile on face.

Happy at last!

Isn't aviation great?