bugy

Hello everybody,

I would like to share, how i left... for the moment.

Some people leave the career by choice or some not, by being furloughed.

I left because I did a kind of b u r n o u t.

It's long story so I will not detail. But mainly, i was young expat in asia for a LCC.
I was kind of person passionnate, my life was only aviation.
After a big delusion I think, and being far away from my land, I was depressed, i had insomnias, and needed serious help. (therapy, medecines)

So I came back.
I felt empty, and a lot frustrated. I lost all the passion.
I was someone who always read aviation, many books, read again my atpl notes etc;
Today I just can not anymore. I don't know what's happening.
For 4 months, I can not open any books related to aeronautic.

It's very difficult to admit it. I feel like a weak person.
Because I knew it, I knew that being a pilot was being an expat.
Seems I could not adapt myself.
Plus I was stressed too. (management, schedule etc).

I was wondering if I was alone in that case ?

Will I come back to fly as f/o ? I don't even know. Today I just feel neutral, empty, and feel like I need to open my mind to new things maybe.
Im alone, and don't have friends (or mostly are pilots) but I don't have a normal life since befre that, my life was only my books and my objective (being pilot).

Thank you for your sympathy.

Slats

What you're feeling is understandable. Is this job for everyone? Absolutely not. For me, there's nothing else I've ever wanted to do. I've lost some of the passion I once had. Mainly due to management, being away from my family and friends does take it's toll. Overall, I love what I do but it is just a job. If I were in your shoes, there's no doubt I would go into another field. Maybe at some point you'll get back into flying for fun. If not, you wouldn't be the first and certainly not the last to remove yourself from the flight deck. Good luck.

bugy

Slats,
Yes I guess I have to see others activities. Maybe just to re-activate the aviation bug. As far as I know, is my brain just can not stand more.

The most difficult part is the look from some members of my family or some friends (in aeronautic). Same remarks "are you crazy, don't you see you are the luckiest guy etc etc"
Poeple just don't understand a pilot leaving the job. Especialy when they knew me before, talking all the time about it, and was happy.
So, I just stay home, being afraid to face people who know me and asking me news.
Sure, for many people, or pilot, I have been very lucky. The problem is that unless living quite the same situation, many can not see how painful it could be. :/
I just know now, that people are interested in us by "what we do" not "who we are".

propfails2FX

Go soaring.

Cheers,

Propfails2FX

flynavyj

You invest an awful lot in this career to getting all the certifications and licenses required, and usually the entry into the career is fueled by passion and love. Add all of that up with perceived "glamor" and the "fun" of the job, and many folks will think you have a dream job, and as such have a hard time understanding why you'd leave the job behind.

I had the same "experience" with family and friends, the question was always "So you're quitting?" or "You won't be a pilot anymore?". Unless you simply enjoy sulking away from the public, you'll eventually have to come to terms with your decision, heck, I had friends questioning my decision even though I doubled my pay, earned better benefits, increased my quality of life, and was getting to sleep in my own bed every night.

Come to terms with your decision, or, get back into the life. There really aren't any other options out there, so there's little point in lamenting over it. The only one who can tell you if your decision was the right one is you.

sulkair

Bugy,

I read another post by you in the health section where you explain experiencing intense anxiety when faced with the prospect of being paired with a difficult Captain - one that yells, and / or makes your trip a living hell.

Most people figure out how to deal with this, but I agree it sucks when you must devote so much energy into coping with a difficult individual, especially when they are running the ship.

When I upgraded to Captain I felt a great wave of relief in that I could now set the tone in the cockpit.

To be sure, there are just as many random difficult cases in the right seat, but they don't get to dictate so they are immeasurably more easy to deal with.

I know you still love flying - you have to because of the devotion you've given to it.

Have you ever thought about a "single pilot" gig? Probably doesn't pay nearly as well, but might make you more happy.

Whatever you decide - don't waste another day doing ANYTHING that makes you feel as bad as you are describing. It isn't worth it.

Best of luck to you my friend.

bugy

Hello all,


I did think about a single pilot job. Actually it was the first thing that crossed my mind after being a bit better.
But as I'm in europe, there are not so many jobs compared to US.
But yes, for sure, I would be happier, at least for a while, until I am ready to come back in a team.

The thing is I was so passionnate that I built a life only around aviation. I never hang out really (with friends), I had a lonely life, hitting my books. Everything was related to aviation. Even my friends.
Consequently, now, im single, alone and need to build a real social life and having different life's opinion etc.
I was living in a bubble.
So now I want to study something else, have another new skill (in case) because don't have any degree, so I'm quite stucked right now (fortunately i don't have wife and kids).
I want to meet new friends and start from "zero".

Of course, beside that, I will keep my licence, and maybe one day, will be ready to ride the horse again.

I was so focused into planes and in my goal, that I did not see all nice things around me.


Flynavj, yes, this situation actually is quite interesting, because i learn a lot about myself, and makes me take a decision. The most difficult part in any such situation is that we are actually "alone" to take a decision.

And we are quite anxious about the futur, but now, I just think I will a do a big step in my life and I can learn new things. Learning and opening my mind to other things does not mean I'm giving up aviation.

Thank you a lot for your support

(btw don't pay attention about mistakes english is my 2nd language)

flynavyj

I had a feeling it was a second language, but don't worry...your 2nd language english skills are better than my 2nd language ANY skills! I think you're doing fine. Good luck!

bugy

Hey all,

to give news, I start getting better, but my strengh is a bit weak maybe.
I did a b u r n o u t.

The airline asked me what happened exactly (seems there is no private life about medical in Asia). Anyway I played the honesty card.

I explained to some people in high management, what I had.
And I proposed them some solutions if I come back and if they would give me second chance. For exemple, why not a part time flight schedule, to start step by step.

I did not get any reply yet.

In Asia, they do not know the medical secret, so... I just acted as their culture is.

Maybe I did wrong ? Maybe they will not take me back for ever.

Well, I explained that it could be interesting for them, for the airline, because I may be the first case, and not sure I will be the only one.
So, it's an experience for everybody to learn from it and how to deal with employees suffering suddenly of a b u r n o u t.

After all, why I should hide myself ? :/ we are all humans.

I explained that it never caused any problems during my flights. Only after the flight, when I came back to my home. Mostly , the problems happen during nights (insomnia etc).

Well.... I will see if I made a mistake to tell all the truth.

Maybe I am naive, but if I were in management, I will not ignore an employee for this kind of problem. I will do my best to re-integrate him slowly, in the best conditions I could.


thanks

johnso29

bugy,

Don't doubt your decision, regardless of high management's answer. The bottom line is that the flying you were doing was clearly putting a high amount of stress/fatigue on you. That will accelerate your aging & damage your health. Look at it this way. By leaving your LCC, you have forced yourself to make friends, communicate with people outside of aeronautics, & question what truly makes you happy. Being happy is a large part of what makes us healthy. So if you take a few years off from flying and decide that aeronautics is what makes you happy, then you can do it again.

Don't take years off of your life because you are so stressed, fatigued, & miserable. You now have a chance to meet people & perhaps make a family.

Good luck in your new adventure.