^^^ Truth...

10% penalty + your income tax bracket = don't raid the IRA/401(k) early.

Get your commercial and look for a 91 job in the right seat of a Caravan somewhere. Slave work and wages, but you can get your ATP and a left seat job someday.

Don’t fall prey to the P2P shysters that leads one to believe employment with an airline is guaranteed after paying $$$$

Just suck it up, get another IT job and continue training through CFI. Years from now when you're flying a Boeing you'll look back and barely remember that extra year you spent dragging @ss in to the office to write code. Plus it will make your ratings all the more sweeter.