A few points of order:
1) I was being facetious.
2) I tip the van drivers.
3) No one said anything about first year pay or not.
4) Even at that, a quick look at the pay scales here on APC reveals several 747 operators whose year 1-3 pay scales might indeed come in below a van drivers net - particularly when I'm guessing the van drivers probably don't report those tips on their taxes.
5) A van driver in Ottumwa, Iowa - maybe not so much. A van driver in a major metropolitan area near a major airport, maybe so.
6) Yes, I know the cost of living is higher in the major metro area - but that's also true for any crews that live in similar areas, so throw that out as a wash.
7) Note the smiley's.
8) Lighten up Francis.