The perception is partly our own fault, for years we've been telling people, when asked if flying is 'hard', "Awe shucks ma'am, ain't nutt'n to it, you just relax, ain't nutt'n to be skeered of up there, it's just like ridin' bike..."

What we should be saying when ever someone asks is, "Holy CRAP! I thought I was going to DIE! That thunderstorm we went straight through was UNBELIEVEABLE!! I was sure the wings were going to come off, man, I need a drink! And a line of blow would help too, any idea where the hookers hang out in Cleveland?"

But we don't, we sugar coat it, and they all think we do nothing more than push that FLY button, sit back and let George do...everything.

Years ago, when I was on the MD88 in CVG I had a little old lady poke her head into the cockpit while boarding, she said, "I know all you guys do up here is push buttons!"

I jumped up out of my seat, and said, "Hi, how are you? Have you ever sat in the Captain's seat? Here, sit down." She sat down, and as she did, I pulled her boarding card out of her hand. She asks, "Where are you going with that?"

I said, "I'm going to go sit in your seat, in the back, and you can push the buttons, and take us to Atlanta. Don't worry, he'll help you." (pointing at F/O).

She jumps up out of my seat and says, "I can't do that, I don't know how!"

I said, "Sure you can, it's just pushing buttons, he'll even tell you which ones to push..."

She scrambled out of there in a hurry, and I never heard any more from her.

I love to put them in the seat and say, "Yeah, it's really easy, so why don't YOU do it, and I'll sleep in the back..."

That shuts them up pretty quickly.