the only thing i am drinking is 100% motivation kool-aid.. its the best!! i know you don't want to delude yourself anymore,, you allowed yourself to fall into the "its to tough and i am not getting anywhere" attitude. As soon as you give up, no one will give you a chance if you don't give it to yourself. like freight puppy said, someone is there, someone is making good money, someone only has to work 13 days a month, why not me? And rest assured if everyone here puts in the time, has a good attitude (that shows), and doesn't give up, all will be where they want to be. Whether it is with pinnacle airlines as a 15 year captain, or moving on to the majors, everyone if they want will get their chance.