OK ... so you've just landed your 747 at a General Aviation airport with no control tower. What's the first clue that you screwed up (besides the fact that you can't tell where you are on the airport diagram and none of the taxiways have standard markings)?
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ALL the taxiways are too small for your widebody airplane?
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How do you get out of your 747 with no jetway and no stairs? Are they still on the airplane?
- Do you have to put a
quarter in the pay phone at the FBO to find out where your transportation to the hotel is?
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Where/how do you park? I read that Boeing sent a tug but it broke down enroute?
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How do you get jet fuel? (although a GA airport with a 6100' runway might get corporate jets and "might" have fuel)
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Do you still have an ATP? Many years ago National Airlines "landed" a 727 in Pensacola Bay. The Flight Engineer got fired. As part of the investigation (discipline?), National Airlines gave the crew simulator check rides. The Engineer didn't pass. Has the FAA/NTSB showed up yet and asked to see your license?
- How do you let other traffic know that there's big obstruction ON THE FRICKIN RUNWAY? Is the airport now closed?
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How do you get the airplane out of there? I know the 747 has "body gear" steering but I bet they can't do a 180 on a 100' wide runway and they can't back up? It's not a simple thing to take the wings off of a 747 - or - do you just mount it on a stand at the airport entrance?
DOH!
