Bay, I'm not a lady and so don't have answers to your questions, but my apologies for the responses you've gotten so far. It wouldn't have made me feel especially welcome, do t let that discourage you

Many of the women I fly with had great experiences with WIA, if you're not involved or a member I would definitely check them out, lots of other pilots there have had the exact same questions as you and are happy to help out.

Best of luck.