My FO: "Delta 1453 ready to taxi."
LGA Ground: "Delta 1453, did you call clearance?"
My FO: "No. My Captain said we're not calling."
LGA Ground: "Why not?"
My FO: "My Captain said... you want me to say that? Okay, my Captain say's #### that. We're not doing the Whitestone climb, he wants vectors and #### holding short of 4, he wants Bravo straight to 13, cleared to cross, #1 for takeoff."
LGA Ground: "Say what???"
My FO: "That's what my Captain said. He said you better ####### do it too."
LGA Ground: "Delta... uh..."
My FO: "My Captain is crying. Profusely. What do I do?"
See this is why I can't have nice stuff.