True and sad ex-military story... The nice conservative gym bag I had been using in the USAF for 15 years became suddenly against regulations when the geniuses in senior command decided to make things suck more, and one of the stupid rules was that gym bags used on base had to be only one color. Mine was a nice deep green and dark blue, looked fine, not an eyesore or "unprofessional", until suddenly it was.

However, they put no restrictions on shopping bags. So I raided my wife's closet and found a few of the brightest shiny reusable shopping bags, and started taking those to the gym instead. Bright pink, huge shiny chrome silver stripes, big flowers, etc etc.

Because I never forgot a rule taught to me as a young kid brand new to a flying squadron... Treat every stupid time-wasting non-operational regulation as a tactical exercise to defeat/circumvent, and consider the morons who write them as your deadly enemies. It's good practice developing habitual thought patterns to defeat the rules your real enemies are using, and it sticks it right in the eye of anyone making the warfighter's job harder with unnecessary rules and regulations.

So. Macy's bag to the USAF gym, in the name of combat effectiveness

Yea yea cool story bro, whatever. Haters gonna hate