Originally Posted by
RJSAviator76
Thanks to "research" and "studies" we started killing flies with hand grenades. Unfortunately, there's no manual that comes with having kids.
Of course, you don't savagely beat a kid to bloody mess to get your point across. There's a lot to be said for 'reasonable, appropriate and necessary' aspect of disciplining a kid. There are various steps and levels of discipline. If a kid spilled a drink on the table, of course, they wouldn't get popped. If they made an honest mistake, of course, they wouldn't get popped. They'd be shown the right way. But lie to me, and they'd get popped without fail. Be disrespectful, and you get popped without fail. And guess what... being consistent is what it's all about. Grounding a kid meant we were also grounded in some way. They need to learn their actions have consequences on others too. And yes, the kids' feelings will be hurt by their actions - you don't shield them from it. That's how they learn.
In short, there's a big difference between discipline and abuse. Most rational people know it. Did my kids have black eyes? No way. Did my kids ever bleed from getting popped? Hell no! Did they have red bums at times? You better believe it.
Sorry, but I don't put much stake in "experts" who brought us 7th place trophies, "safe spaces" in college, and the butthurt generation (the ones who get offended at anything they don't like). If this is your idea of "advanced world", I truly feel sorry for you and for the generations coming after us. I think the "doomed world" is far more appropriate.
The key word is discipline. It is possible to impart discipline without physical violence. Just because someone refuses to hit their kid doesn't mean they won't discipline them.
My neighbor's kids growing up were never hit by their parents. Their kids include two doctors, a teacher/coach and paramedic and all very successful. It isn't zero sum. If you choose not to hit your kids, it doesn't by default mean they do whatever they want like your are implying. The "be your kid's friend" is what has caused the safe spaces generation.