Limited time offer.

Need proof that:

• you are FedEx
• you are a member of good standing at APC
• you do not speak Chinese
• you speak/understand ok English
• you are going to Hong Kong
• or you are being sent there against your will

If the lesson lasts longer than 15 minutes, you have to bring your own Scooby snack box. If, however, you are unable to learn anything useful after three lessons, your username will be revealed right here on the boards and everyone will have a good laugh at your expense. Now that is a fate worse than a poor landing on a bright, clear day in MEM.

Other languages available, but those lessons are limited to swear words or words otherwise prohibited by the mods or Terms of Service, in which case YOU should probably be teaching ME instead.

Please respond to this ad before it gets deleted.