Great posts, Radialgal.
I for one will always offer to have dinner/beers with a female first officer. My wife is a pilot who quit to stay home with the kids. Men don’t realize how tough/awkward it can be for a woman to go to a bar or restaurant alone, especially in a hotel. At least offering to accompany them doesn’t mean you are setting yourself up for a career-ending accusation, it means you are a decent human being who is trying to make a co-worker’s day a little easier.