I thought that training for your CFI required you to work with someone that had been doing CFI work for more than 2 years. The timebuilding guys are usually out by then. As far as flight training, isn't it just "commercial from the right seat" mixed with "instruction while flying"? Doing the commercial maneuvers could be done solo or splitting time with another pilot instead of paying for a CFI, either you can meet the standards from the right seat or you need to practice more.
I guess I'm confused about why a pilot at your level would be leaning so heavily on the crutch of letting the CFI plot the course of your training? Own it, partner with a CFI who will help you accomplish your objectives.
If you had it out with your CFI without resolution, talk to his boss. If you feel the problem is endemic to the flight school, use a different flight school or work with a CFI that's unaffiliated with a flight school. Most FBOs can give you a list of local CFIs who might take you on as a student.
Good luck and congrats on the retirement.