Agree that term is best when you're young.
Whole life might have value for specific situations but you should have other retirement vehicles so why would the spouse even need it then? Even most pensions have a survivor option. IMO best to use pure investment vehicles for investment, not something which is also trying to be insurance.
One consideration for pilots... if your spouse passes away, in order to keep your job you're going to need to hire full-time live-in childcare for when you're on the road. Even for high-school kids with a driver's license, you really want an adult in the house. Unless you have really accommodating relatives living nearby. That's probably $75K/year, on top of any income lost from the spouse's job so you probably need a policy on the spouse, even if she doesn't work.