Hahahaha....I got one for ya.....I flew with a Captain in DCA almost a year ago. I was on reserve and got a 4 day trip. I had the airplane all set up before the Capt. and FA showed up.

The Capt. says "Alex....I really dont fee like doing anything this week...so you're gonna play Captain...You brief the weather....make PA's and everything else....You're gonna do the taxiing too...if you need to turn tight just say "Tiller" and ill give it to you...all im doing is signing the release"

Needless to say....it made for an interesting trip. The guy was a major
D-Bag. If i'd of known better at the time or maybe wasnt brand new, i would have called Pro Standards. No one would have cared either....I dont know anyone who actually likes flying with the guy