we used to have a FA who when someone said "this plane is so small", she would answer with "ohh, really? how big is your plane"

haha

Also, about pax going to the wrong destination:

We have a CA who had a latin american passenger on his flight who spoke very poor english and obviously rarely flew. Upon arrival in Nassau, the passenger was confused and got his point across to the CA that he was supposed to be in Nashville. Turns out he bought his ticket over the phone and I guess the agent misunderstood his request. As a gesture of good faith, the CA non-revved him to Nashville! Great guy.