In a related development;

Hospitals nationwide report their Emergency Rooms have been swamped since the UPS announcement. They report a rash of tongue injuries.

Further investigation revealed most are UPS pilots, having stepped on their own tongues in their eagerness to kick USPS employees to the curb.

Doctors are still not in agreement on how to treat the ailment. Half the doctors say they are inclined to treat the patients’ clumsiness, while the other half prefer to address the obvious morally handicapped issues.