How does an FA get a pension? She marries a pilot.

How does an FA double her pension? Divorces him

What does an FA do to keep from feeling grumpy in the morning? Dumps him at the airport.

How do you know your date is a pilot? He'll tell you.

How do you know your date with a pilot is half over? He says, "Enough about me, let's talk about airplanes."

Did you hear about the new "honest" seating labels on (insert airline here)? First class, third world, and steerage.

What do you do if Tempelhof tower yells at you for missing the taxiway and inquires whether you've ever been there? Say, "Yeah, in '45, but it was a different Boeing and I didn't have to stop."

What's the 3 letter acronym for the dumbest guy at the airline? CEO!

What's long, hard, and filled with seamen? A navy charter. (Tell it out loud. My apologies if this is too off color.)