More than you know
I don't think being part of a "four ship" constitues "flying with" somebody, does it?
What you don't seem to understand is when you "fly with" somebody in a "four ship" you don't do it just once. You do it countless times. You live with the person in the squadron. You get to see his/her character, how they lead and how they follow. If you haven't done it you can't understand.