I am willing to pay $5.25 cash to anyone who has a pristine copy of that ALPA magazine. However, if you had to fish yours out of the garbage can after this scandal broke, I'll pay $2.87 to account for the coffee grounds stains. I will pay no more than $.05 if the famous picture of TM is defaced or obliterated.

A further bonus - if you an APC member in good standing, I'll also give you a coupon for a free 20 oz mocha at my coffee shop!