Serious answer!

Used these first about 10 years ago in Brussels.

1. The operator drives the vehicle to the aircraft and 'locks' it to the aircraft.
2. It uses rollers to rotate the aircrafts wheels
3. The operator establishes comms on headset with flight crew
4. He uses a remote control to command the movement of the tug
5. He gives turn instruction to the flight crew when to turn/in which direction
6. Engines are started during the push
7. He advises when to stop
8. He remotely releases the tug from the aircraft
9. Aircraft taxys away
10. Operator returns to tug and when seated drives it away.

Works well up to A320/B737 size and only requires one operator ie no wingman etc.