The best way is go to Orthodontics school. Buy a fun plane with your steady, stable, income and love aviation. Then pick a NICE vacation destination and find a a hotel, without a MacDonalds out the side door, and make a reservation. Then buy a 1st class ticket to said destination on a "major" and there you have it. You made it to a Major!!
Now sit back and enjoy flight attendants actually paying some attention to you and when the flight is over shake the pilot's hands and express you sincere sympathy by simple saying, "I'm sorry for your tragedy". He will know what you mean without any explanation.

Good luck!

ps, I am serious, but if you are dead set on flying for a living then I agree with the military option. I would stay in though vs getting out to do airlines. Like me, you will probably not follow the above advice but in 20 years you will wish you had.