What is reasonable?
 

I have been supporting my husband as he's been training with a flight school (not at a 141, just a little independent school at an FBO), but I'm running out of steam. We have two small children and it's getting harder and harder to keep up with all of the bills on my own. I am self-employed and I am stressed and stretched to my limits.

He just passed his instrument check ride two weeks ago. He has 200 flight hours currently. Realistically, how long should it take him to get to 250 and get his commercial rating? He is not working at all, so flying is his full time focus, but it seems go to so much slower than I can stand. He quit working last October and just got his IFR in mid-April. He already had his private and about 100 hours before he quit. Does this seem reasonable? 6 months from 100 hours to IFR? I thought that would go much (much) faster.

He says I'm being unreasonable. I say he could be going faster to get me out of this stress-hell and he's not trying hard enough.

I completely acknowledge that he could be right. Maybe I am being unreasonable. I'd like him to finish commercial in the next 4-6 weeks. Is that crazy? :confused:

Please help me understand what would be a realistic goal. We're really cracking under this pressure. I just need to see the light at the end of this tunnel and to understand how much longer I need to hold this together on my own.

Depends on the weather. Where I live, most days we still cannot fly due to icing concerns. I used to live in California, and I was able to build 200ish hours in about 4 months.

The stress is understandable but as pilots it's really important that we don't allow external pressures to force us to fly.

I'm not sure what your financial situation is but if he finds someone to split time with him it would lessen the burden by a substantial amount

Doing a commercial in 4-6 weeks is completely doable, but it's important to note that your husband won't really be employable unless he gets his instructor certificate, hits 500 hours, or gets an aerial survey job (which probably won't happen since he would then be gone for many months)

Maybe he needs at least a part time, paying job? Age? Any college could factor in. The military reserves may take him, some pay, but he’d also be away some.

We live in Florida, so there's been no real weather issues since he quit his job in October (just some cancellations for low clouds and wind, as to be expected). The rainy season will start in June though and then we'll have more of a weather problem, but he has 200 hours, so only needs 50 more hours at this point (plus study time to pass the exams).

When you built the 200 hours in 4 months, were you working at all? Or just flying full-time?

I would LOVE for him to get a part time job at this point (I was on board with him leaving his job back in October to speed things up, but now I'm just so frustrated), but he he is very against that idea and said it would extend how long it would take him to get his commercial by a LOT (like, up to 6 months). ?????

He's 35, has a four year degree and a sales background. We're not tempted by military since we are SO close. (And kinda old. Ha.)

I gotta give him(and you) credit for the 30+ y/o career change. I do think he could do something that would pay while not slowing his training down.

Yeah, at that age I’d forget most military options. All the best with the transition.

Ha! Thank you. I'll take all the credit I can get. :P
It's definitely not been the easiest thing we've ever done.

I wouldn't quit working to learn to fly; it can be done after hours and on the weekends.

Tell him to get back to work.

This could end badly if things don’t change. I applaud you for supporting your man, this is a tremendous act in and of itself. However, your man has to understand that his priorities, in order of importance are:

#1 Supporting you and the kids (family comes first)
#2 Pursuing his career goals

If this situation is causing financial stress, time to make a change. He needs to contribute financially.

So in 6 months your husband has flown 100 hours and only got his instrument rating?
That's slow. Very slow. You can go from 0 to all ratings you need and 500 hours in 6 months. I flew 400 hours in 6 months when going for my career change (same age etc as your husband).

Is your budget limiting the hours he is flying?
You do realize he won't get a job at 250 hours with just his commercial? He'll either need to build a few hundred hours more to get up to 135 VFR PIC minimums, get his CFI, or get extremely lucky.