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Corny357 02-17-2009 06:12 AM


Originally Posted by jedinein (Post 560743)
There's a line in the first Matrix movie about how the "first matrix" was a happy place but the human brains couldn't stand it, thus whole crops were lost.

People that have time to spend on internet forums are generally not out there with a family spending time with that family.

They may be pilots stuck in shoddy hotels with somewhat working internet connections, 12 y/o's pretending to be somebody, or folks that hate the world and want to bring everyone down. They might even be folks that try to share their experiences, in the hopes that someone else will avoid the pitfalls along the path of life.

Some might not want a family with the 2.5 kids, the dog, and a white picket fence. Some might not want that until their own career is established. For some, it's the most important thing there is.

If you spend a bunch of time online, you'll generally see lots of complaining. It's easier to complain than to get up and do something about it. It's far easier to destroy than to build. Negative Nancy's probably outnumber Pollyannas 10 to 1 online. Flights are long, hopefully boring, and many times, it's the same person next to you, so you've already told all your stories, so you have to go online to let that stuff out, and what usually comes out is complaints.

It took 3 years of working in a cubicle before I decided to leave that very lucrative career and step into the aviation world full-time. Only one year did I match the income I had from that previous life, the rest of the time, money has been tight, but I still get my newfangled computer or gadget generally when I want, if not within a few months. We've got more opportunities and wealth now than my grandparents had during the Great Depression, money isn't that tight. With that, I'm one of the happiest people I know, with hundreds of pilot friends around the world who are also the happiest people I know. I have dozens of business-owner clients, also happy people, doing what they love to do, and, enjoying flying as a hobby. There are a few that see flying merely as a tool to allow them more time with their families, however, I see them flying on the weekends showing their kids and grandkids how to fly, much as other parents would be showing their kids how to sail, change the oil in a car, hunt, fish, or make a quilt. Of those clients that have a business, they enjoy the challenge of owning and running that business. The most successful ones are doing what they love.

Flying is not all puppies and warm fuzzies, and not good stuff does happen. That not good stuff, the roughage of life, will happen in aviation, owning a business, working for someone else, or even not working and being on welfare. I think the roughage is part of life to make us appreciate the good stuff more. I nearly quit one flying job over the frustration of trying to get a parking permit, this after six weeks of training and who knows how many thousands of dollars of opportunity cost. I stuck with it and got rewarded by being able to look DOWN on another of the company's aircraft from the front seat while in flight during a gorgeous sunset. Ya can't get that in flight sim.

If you're lucky, you find out what you love and do that when you're young. If you really love it, the roughage will be overcome by the love. If you don't, it's perfectly okay to move on to something else. You can do something else for awhile, decide you don't like it, and then decide to do something else. You're not married to a company, and no worries, no company is married to you. You'll have to decide if you want to put up with the cold and snow that is UND. Or find something more local as there are plenty of colleges with aviation programs including several in Florida. There's even online colleges that allow student loan funds to be spent on flight training.

Flying and a family can be compatible, same with those in the military on long deployments with families. It can be done. It requires, *GASP*, some hard work to make the relationship work, but it can be done. If I ever get around to wanting a husband, I'd want that husband to be a pilot as we share the same language. I don't want someone that is going to be complaining about my being gone pursuing what I love. I fully expect him to pursue what he loves and when we are together, we're sharing mutual passions. This means both of us are going to have to compromise, share, find compatibilities, and work together on a relationship. It's not going to be all puppies and warm fuzzies, but the warm fuzzies will greatly outnumber the roughage.

Bottom line: It's up to you to decide you are going to enjoy the present while preparing for a future that you will also enjoy. How you get there is your decision.

Wow. That's gonna be one of the best posts I've ever read on here. Thank you so much.

mshunter 02-17-2009 08:42 AM


Originally Posted by Corny357 (Post 554225)
Yeah, yeah I know you guys have gotten these threads before, but it's so different when you're the one asking...

I'd bore you with my story about how I got into aviation and how much I love it and blah blah blah, but I'll just let you assume that I love it to death, and I honestly cannot see myself being happy doing anything else because that's the truth.

I'm presently a student at U Miami, but I'm wondering if I want to transfer to a place like UND or something similar. I know the deal about doing an aviation major, and I wouldn't do it. Right now, I have my PPL and IR, and I can't do anything past that cause of money and time. If I went to UND, I could pick up all my ratings.

I have heard from so many regional guys and even people at the majors how much it sucks. It hurts to have your life dream shat on like that by reality, but I guess that's, well, reality. I just want to be able to do what I love, have a relatively normal life, normal family, and hopefully a few years in, at least a normal paycheck.

Do what I love, or...?

Now, the reason I want to go to UND is because it opens up a bunch more options for me. ATC has always been in the picture, too. Maybe I could do that. Or if I decide to stick with the flying route, I could do that. Or say I decide to do neither, well, that could work too. Agree? Disagree? Comments, suggestions, opinions, thoughts? All I know right now is that I hope to do something involving aviation. I feel like it's all I'd be happy doing. So, if you'd be so kind, please take that into account, and everything else I've said too.

Try not to let me down too hard...I think I smell what's coming.

If you have to ask yourself that question, then don't do it. You have to fly becuase you love it, otherwise all the hard work you will have put in will be for nothing when you get furloughed and move on to plan be, and don't come back. Not everyone gets furghloughed, but those that are unsure if this is what they want, usually don't come back when they do.

de727ups 02-17-2009 09:16 AM

"Those that are unhappy have a family to take of. Is that a correct assessment?"

I don't think that's correct at all. I think having a family does make it harder and more of a challenge, however, I know many pilots who have successfully balanced the famliy/career challenge and are still happy with the job.

I would say you need a spouse who is independant. One who has their own life and doesn't need you around every moment to solve every problem. One who can take care of themselves and is happy in doing so. One who knows/understands your career choice before starting a family.

I'm happily a single guy, but by far most pilots I know have a family and aren't sorry they became pilots. I think this is a career you marry, as well, to some extent. But I think most careers are like that.


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