kapn Klown

Please allow me to introduce meself
I be a pirate of wealth and taste
I be around for a long, long year
Stole many a pegboy's soul to waste

I was 'round when Wilbur Wright
Had his moment of flight
Made damn sure that Amelia
Lost her way and sealed her fate

Pleased to meet ye
Hope ye guess me name
But what's puzzling ye
Be the nature of me game

I stuck around Denver town
When I saw it was a time for a change
Killed the loads and passed out flyers
While CAL pegboys screamed in vain

I rode a skank
Held a pegboy's crank
When the orgy raged
And me body stank
(Arr arr, arr arr)

I watched with glee
While the pegboys and queens
Fought for tree decades
For the god they made
After all, that is ME
(Arr arr, arr arr)

I shouted out,
Who killed Continental?
When after all
It was TORQUE and me
(Arr arr, arr arr)

Let me please introduce meself
I be a pirate of wealth and taste
And I laid traps for pegboys
Who I keelhauled before we reached Bombay
(Arr arr, arr arr)

Pleased to meet ye
Hope ye guessed me name, oh yeah
(Arr arr)

But what's puzzling ye
Be the nature of me game, oh yeah, get down, baby
(Arr arr, arr arr)

Just as every hooker is a girlfriend
And all the crazies sane
As up is down
Just call me kaptain Klown
'Cause I be in need o' some restraint
(Arr arr, arr arr)

So if ye meet me
Have some courtesy
Have some sympathy, and some taste
(Arr arr)

Use all yer well-learned politesse
Or I be keelhaulin' ye, mm yeah
(Arr arr, arr arr)

Pleased to meet ye
Hope ye guessed me name, mm yeah
(Arr arr)

But what's puzzling ye
Be the nature of me game, mm mean it, get down
(Arr arr, arr arr)

Tell me pegboy, what's me name
Tell me honey, can ye guess me name
Tell me pegboy, what's me name
I tell ye one time, yer to blame



Arr, mateys, I be kaptain Klown. Arr!
In a wee bit, I be scuttlin' me fine ship, th' olde Whale an' commandeerin' th' Bigfoot.
Th' olde Whale be th' finest ship that ereset sail an' I will regale ye wi' endless stories o' th' mightee Whale. Arr!
The Bigfoot be a far inferior ship but I be hoistin' th' lass' mainsail an' get all ye scurvy dawgs in line to plunder the seas with me skipperin'. Arr!

What`s me game?
I's be lookin' fer blind obedience from me pegboys, er FOs, an' want t' make clear t' all o' ye Bigfoot pegboys what be me rules. Arr!

There be nay sustenance in th' bunk room. All sustenance be consumed on th' flight deck durin' breaks. Nekked. Arr!
If ye be Canuck, ye be sittin' on me lap while ye eat an' we be watchin' me Gladiator movies. Arr!

I got me HKG wenches in place an' they's lettin' me know who be loyal t' me an' who be walkin' th' plank. Arr!
There be nay talkin` t' me wenches while they be servin` sustenance t' th' slaves in th' hull.
There be nay hoardin' th' Dasani sparklin' water on me ship; that's fer th' slaves in th' hull.
Ye be warned, pegboys. Arr!

I expects th' same blind loyalty t' me that me finest pegboy, Bloviatin' Brit, has shown. Arr!

If any o' ye pegboys think CRM applies on me ship, it doesn't. Arr!
'Tis called KRM on me ship - kap Klown Rules this Man-o-war! Arr!
Ye pegboys shut up an' watch a Gladiator movie or ye be walkin' th' plank. Arr!

All ye loyal pegboys make sure ye greet me wi', "Arr kap`n, I be ready t' plunder th' seas wi' ye on th' good ship Bigfoot, arr!"
Th' rest o' ye scurvy dawgs be prepared to walk me plank. Arr!

777 be ye new mark o' th' Beast. Arr!

Broncofan

Someone has a lot of time on their hands

Jaded N Cynical

Was *** Clown already taken as a screen name?

MasterOfPuppets

Well.......Jerry lost it......

Lerxst

Maybe Jer is Staller...

MasterOfPuppets

You just blew my mind.

89Pistons

Hilarious! This should have stayed in the United forum as opposed to Hanger Talk. It really is UAL specific. No one else would know what this is really about.

tomgoodman

I doubt that anyone else wants to know.

Vincent Chase

Truer words never spoken.