no good topics? Be the change you want to see in the world

 

Two a. m. where? 2 am there is 12:30 p. m. here!

 

That's why

 

Hey mods, we need better smileys

 

Hold yer horses there young fella, some times ya young whipersnapers need ta get your facts straighted out. Some them unedumcated people like all them shinny things that makes them feel all good on the inside, like that first sip o shine on a hotter than heck day, or when their sister winks at em as she walks behind the woodshed. So they hop on that there slow boat to china land and flyer around with some them there china men to make a few bucks. Gotta put them their bull horns on that there caddy somehow I reckon. Now if ya’ll excuse me I gots ta round me up ma posse, to find this Muchacho character ya hear!

Not only do I train the Chinese, but I eat their food to.

And yes ginger is a ginger. And dammit, ginger just tastes good!

 

The details of my life are quite inconsequential... very well, where do I begin? My father was a relentlessly self-improving boulangerie owner from Belgium with low grade narcolepsy and a penchant for buggery. My mother was a fifteen year old French prostitute named Chloe with webbed feet. My father would womanize, he would drink. He would make outrageous claims like he invented the question mark. Sometimes he would accuse chestnuts of being lazy. The sort of general malaise that only the genius possess and the insane lament. My childhood was typical. Summers in Rangoon, luge lessons. In the spring we'd make meat helmets. When I was insolent I was placed in a burlap bag and beaten with reeds- pretty standard really. At the age of twelve I received my first scribe. At the age of fourteen a Zoroastrian named Vilma ritualistically shaved my testicles. There really is nothing like a shorn scrotum... it's breathtaking- I highly suggest you try it.

 

How many smiley faces? Lots. Here's one.
Thanks for brightening the day, ya'll!

 

Did anyone go to this site? The message board? Endless entertainment, folks. Endless.

 

Pirates...

If you were a pirate would you be a good one or a bad one?

What would be your incentives/demands most of the time?

What kind of equipment and crew would you have?

-or-

Would you be a pirate hunter???

 

If you could have one (and only one) super power, what would it be and why?