jungle

Author unknown


With the new influx of illegals, we must accept reality and learn the new English if we are to survive. The conversation below gives you an idea of what to expect if the other person knows more English than "que?"

I was recently in Miami and decided to learn the Spanish language so I could understand the check-outs at McDonalds.

My next move is to learn Indian, so I can understand my doctors and the person that answers the phone when I have a warranty problem.
Yep, by the time I read this, I was able to understand the 1st line.

"TENJOOBERRYMUDS"...

In order to continue getting-by in America (our homeland), we all need to learn the NEW English language! Practice by reading the following conversation until you are able to understand the term "TENJOOBERRYMUDS".

With a little patience, you'll be able to fit right in.
Now, here goes...

The following is a telephone exchange between maybe you as a hotel guest and room-service somewhere in the good old U S A today.......

Room Service : "Morrin. Roon sirbees."

Guest : "Sorry, I thought I dialed room-service."

Room Service: " Rye ..
Roon sirbees...morrin! Joowish to oddor sunteen???"

Guest: "Uh..... Yes, I'd like to order bacon and eggs.."

Room Service: "Ow July den?"

Guest: ".....What??"

Room Service: "Ow July den?!?... Pryed, boyud, poochd?"

Guest: "Oh, the eggs! How do I like them? Sorry.. Scrambled, please."

Room Service: "Ow July dee baykem? Crease?"

Guest: "Crisp will be fine."

Room Service: "Hokay. An Sahn toes?"

Guest: "What?"

Room Service: "An toes. July Sahn toes?"

Guest: "I... Don't think so."

RoomService: "No? Judo wan sahn toes???"

Guest:
"I feel really bad about this, but I don't know what 'judo wan sahn toes' means."

RoomService: "Toes! Toes!...Why Joo don Juan toes? Ow bow Anglish moppin we bodder?"

Guest: "Oh, English muffin!!! I've got it! You were saying 'toast'... Fine...Yes, an English muffin will be fine."

RoomService: "We bodder?"

Guest: "No, just put the bodder on the side."

RoomService: "Wad?!?"

Guest: "I mean butter...Just put the butter on the side."
RoomService: "Copy?"

Guest: "Excuse me?"

RoomService: "Copy...tea..meel?"

Guest: "Yes. Coffee, please... And that's everything."

RoomService: "One Minnie.
Scramah egg, crease baykem, Anglish moppin, we bodder on sigh and copy .......Rye ??"

Guest: "Whatever you say.."

RoomService: "Tenjooberrymuds."

Guest: "You're welcome"

Remember I said "By the time you read through this YOU WILL UNDERSTAND 'TENJOOBERRYMUDS' ".......and you do, don't you!

Thedude

Almost like Bladeruner

badflaps

Cracked me up.. I live in Honduras, sometimes when they are speaking 'murican, I ask them, what is that in Spanish?

John Carr

Or Clockwork Orange.