Am I being selfish? Please advise
 

Greetings all,

I haven't posted in a while since I got my ppl. I hope everyone is doing well.

I just wanted to get some opinions on the following, as I really only have my family to ask in person which offer biased opinions. I'll give it to you straight:

I'm 24 years old, have a great wife, and a 2 year-old daughter. I am currently working at a very good job in IT as a developer. I make decent money, and my wife is a translator from home who supplements my income quite nicely.

My father has been working with the company that I am working at now for many many years, and now makes a great salary, however even though I actually do find interest in the work, and am rather good at it, I still have doubts about staying here forever.

My original plan when I was in college was to get my bachelors degree and then try and enter the military officer program(i wanted to fly but my color-blindness deterred me as I figured I'd never get a flying gig). I had 1 semester left to graduate after coming back from studying abroad, but things happen and I ended up becoming a father, and entered the working world rather quickly.

I plan to sooner, rather than later get my degree so I have it as a backup, but I still also am having a daily battle on when that time comes if I want to enlist and try and get into an officer program.

So my question is, is it selfish to enter the military "after" you have a family? Do people ever do this? I mean, the reason I want to join now isn't to fly, I want to dedicate some service to my country, and it always was the plan to go in.

My wife fully supports this and encourages me to work towards it, however my parents are 100% completely against it.

Any thoughts?

My parents quit making decisions for me when I turned 18.
I listened to them for advice, considered their opinions, and then made my own decisions - and lived with the consequences. My mother didn't want me to join the Marines. I'm glad I followed my own path.

Look at the military divorce rate for your answer. Your decisions no longer just affect you.

GO RESERVES or AIR GUARD.

If you choose Active Duty, expect a very difficult life for you and your family...wish I were joking.

One of the options I have also been thinking about (air guard) .

As others suggested, try the guard or reserves. If you want to go full time eventually, that will likely be an option depending on the branch.

If you are implying that miltary rates are high, I'd say anecdotally, at least in the Air Force Corps, it is one-half to one-third the national average.

I don't think you're being selfish at all! I did the same thing and joined the Air Guard when I was 25 (Now 28) with a wife, son, and one on the way. I was and still am employed at a regional and got hired on to fly C-130's which I'm doing training for right now before I head back to my unit. UPT was long but I was able to have the whole family head down with me and my wife was able to get a leave of absence from work for a year and taught off base.
The whole thing has been a great experience! Aside from being able to serve our country, it's given us different perspectives on lots of subjects and has opened tons of opportunities. I'm definitely planning on staying in as long as they'll keep me.

Let me know what other questions you've got!

Would need to see a photo of wife to provide input.

Sorry for the quote, I wanted to have it handy.

I did about half my active duty time in the Navy as an enlisted avionics technician, straight out of high school. Good training, poor money and working conditions. Treated fairly but sometimes harsh. Being enlisted means giving up some freedom and being told what to do 24/7 your first few years until you get promoted to NCO. At that point your life will improve but you are still enlisted. During my enlistment, I managed to finish 3 years of college towards a BS degree and get my tickets up through CFI at the Navy flying club. I left the Navy voluntarily as an E-6, Petty Officer First Class.

Second half of 20 years was as an Army Warrant Officer, flying Blackhawks. Best decision I could have made at the time. You are treated with respect and given freedom that you won't see as an enlisted man. Better money and quality of life for me and my family was noticeably better. Added benefit of being able to fly for a living, sort of. I retired from the Army as a Chief Warrant Officer 3 (CW3).

Whether you are enlisted or officer, the needs of the service come first. What you want is secondary, at best. Will your requests and desires be granted? Sometimes. You will typically be given a few choices and have to pick one for training and/or base assignment. Remember that I am talking about active duty here.

QOL for you and your family will vary based on whether you are at home or deployed. Financially you are stable and your income is predictable. When you are deployed, you may not see your family for a year. Plans must be made for how they will be taken care of in your absence. Benefits and services on base are adequate, but who will fix a leaking faucet? There are many things to consider when you have a family to take care of.

Having said all of that, your decision to serve your country is admirable. I wish more of our young citizens had your mindset. However, you are now in a position to comfortably take care of your family. Right now, that is your primary responsibility. You will be able to support your family as an officer, but as an enlisted man you will struggle for a few years until you can get promoted to an NCO rank (generally E-5 and higher). Without a college degree, options are limited in terms of being an officer. Without a degree, you can still be an Army Warrant Officer and fly if that's what you want.

Just remember that it's no longer just you. Your life is now dedicated to taking care of your wife and children. That's forever, by the way. If you were single, I'd say it's a no-brainer. Being a husband and father makes your decision impact them as well. You sound like you are an intelligent young man who cares for his wife and children. If I were in your shoes with no degree and a family to support, I would not consider enlistment. If you are determined to serve, decide what's more important to you: being a leader (commissioned officer), or do you want to fly? If you are more concerned with being a leader and developing your management skills, I'd say you need to get your degree first and then volunteer to be a commissioned officer (you can also be a pilot). If you just want to make the leap and are more focused on being a pilot, I'd say volunteer to be an Army Warrant Officer as an aviator. I advise against being an enlisted man in your current situation.

Whatever decision you make, be very careful when it comes time to sign the papers. Make sure you know what you are volunteering for! Also, remember that once you sign those papers, you are committed to the service. You will do what you are told, or face the consequences. There is no such thing as quitting (without severe consequences). Life gets better after training and you have learned your specialty, but you belong to Uncle Sam regardless.

Good luck.

Edit: I just remembered reading that you have color blindness. Have you determined if this will disqualify you for a flight slot in the military? You must find out where you stand with that before moving forward. Medical issues are difficult at best to overcome as a flight candidate. I'll leave those parts of my post for those who might be interested. BTW, there are some interesting IT careers in the military, both Enlisted and Officer.