It's really sad that I actually want to be put on hold so I can listen to it... at least for a minute. See what you've done, now I can't get it out of my head.

Less than 5 minutes, on a busy evening.

I don't wait. It's not my job to waste my cell phone minutes for minutes on end waiting on a scheduler to free up. If they don't pick up, I hang up. It's never that important for me to speak to scheduling.

I like flying the trip with out calling them (especially if it just gets me to the overnight) if they don't answer. The phone call you get is priceless..

CS: Where are you?

Me: Where do you think I am?

CS: your operating flight XXXX at 2030.

ME: Wasn't that fligh tlike 3 hours ago

CS: yea

ME: Is it still here:

(pause) (pause) (pause)

CS: ah...no it showed it landed in EWR at 2220.

ME: Oh, i guess the CA didn't wait...what do you want me to do?

This is my favorite question from CS. That fact that they need to ask this proves to me they are the most incompetent employees in the company.

Next time they call me I should put THEM on hold and see how long they wait.

0 to 10 minutes......

Want to mess with them really good, get a good recording device and record the phone tree that you get when you call crew scheduling. When they call, pick up the phone and then playback the recording.

I got a crew scheduler to call and hang up 3 times one night (he was a friend, but figured that the phone system was malfunctioning- ended up calling me with his personal cellphone!) :D

Funny you say that. I actually flew with a captain that told me whenever scheduling calls him at home, he answers with "Captian Smith, Please hold". He then puts down the phone for a few minutes and walks away.

I can not wait to try this one.

If a hub is being slammed by weather it can be 15-20 mins. The vast majority of the time it is anywhere from 0-5 mins. I only call when I must, I will not call scheduling to remind them to do their job. Where I work schedulers and the company don't treat us too nice so we aren't very "willing" to go above and beyond when someone else makes a mistake. Many times it is easier to just speak to a supervisor when a new class of schedulers comes in b/c they will try some CRAZY stuff.

True story- happened a few weeks ago:
CS: "We show you did not check in this morning for your 8:30 report time. Looks like your first turn went out on time and you are on your way back to mem on Leg 4- just want to make sure you came to work so if you can call us back when you land and let us know you are here that would be great"

Me calling CS: "hey, (recognize its the same girl that called with the voicemail) could I speak with the supervisor"

Sup: "OMG please tell me she didn't call you"
Me: "Yep she did- wondered how the flights were going without an FO"
Sup: "I am soo sorry! You would not believe the stupidity in this room!"
Me: "Just out of curiousity- who did she think was flying in the seat?"
Sup: "She prob thought hopes and dreams- we are still struggling with her realizing we need 2 pilots for each flight and they can't be in the same seat to make it work"
Me: "Thats scary"
Sup: "Welcome to my world- have a great flight!"


Not word for word but basically what was said- truly amazing that any flight gets out!