as a married man (yes, I identify as a straight man), I made it crystal clear to my wife that my career matters to me. She made it crystal clear that my career matters to her, but being a family matters to her too. I fell into the trap in the regional world of working as hard as I could, for A: the money and B: the PIC time. One night, after picking up yet another OT trip, she wasn't there the next morning when I got home. Frantic, I called/texted and no response. Turns out she was at the grocery store, buying things to make for our "talk" breakfast. She made it very clear that I meant more to her than money or the career. I relented in picking up OT.
Point is, it's a balance between achieving your career dreams and juggling the needs of your family. Your needs are important; so are theirs. Did you dork up your bid? Probably. But look at it this way - blessing in disguise?