As for the logging of instrument time... Ask that question to 10 different FSDO feds and you'll get a different answer each time. I had several feds tell me you can log it when you are the non-flying pilot because you are a "required crewmember" for the aircraft. My understanding of the regs says when you are the "sole manipulator of the flight controls" which would make me believe only when you are the pilot flying. But apparently a few Feds say otherwise.
When it comes to IAP's you can only log the ones you flew. That is for sure.