500 TFP or nothing- may as well after my wife left me for gunning for 250 TFP/ month

LTD- with 300 percent increase- if I can't fly then the company better pay for it.

crew meals- I better have Ruth's Chris up there.

Hotels- the Ritz with the flight attendants being on the other side of town.

the NEC better be 30% so I can afford my 5th wife divorce.

and damn those FOs- they can have the 757 rates but I want Airbus 400 rates.

i also want my call sign stenciled on Freedom one- hard line in the sand.