Originally Posted by andy171773

SNAKES ON A PLANE
(1) Airplane Controls.......................VERIFY AS OPERATIVE
snakes on plane may interfere with cable and hydraulic systems

F/A AND/OR EITHER PILOT INCAPACITATED DUE TO SNAKE BITE
YES
| (1) The remaining crew member will hide body, as to not disturb the | passengers
| (2) Land at Nearest suitable airport
| (3) Do not go to the bathroom, without looking where you are aiming
|
| NOTE: SNAKES MAY BE LOITERING IN LAV, WAITING TO BITE ANYTHING DANGLING
NO
(1) Pull the Samuel L. Jackson Emergency Lever
(2) Put on oxygen masks and ear plugs to nullify the "swear" factor
(3) Do not under ANY circumstance, say "what"
(4) Do not say what, even if you're asked to say it "one more time"

Prior to Landing:
(1) Royale with Cheese..............ORDER
(2) Snakes...............YELL AT THEM AND TELL THEM YOU'RE TIRED OF THEM EXISTING ON YOUR PLANE