I want to share some anecdotes of what employers DO NOT want to see from job applicants. These are actual and factual. Needless to say, I would not be interested in any of them. HR at airlines are not going to be either if you do it trying to get that $20 an hour FO job at Mesa.

1. One resume and application packet came in with smudges and stains on every page. Several pages were even stuck together.

2. Another resume came in wafting of some kind of perfume. Was the work history that bad that she needed to cover up the stench? This one went into the biohazard waste bin along with the one above.

3. One young woman was called in for a first interview. She came into my office wearing a very tight-fitting blouse with peasant sleeves. For some reason, I thought of this porn flick I once saw in graduate school where the women dress up depending on the guy’s fantasy. There was the French Maid, the Nurse, the Schoolgirl, and this Peasant Girl. Gag and gag some more.

4. One woman did not and could not make eye contact during the interview. I am still not sure today if she was hiding something or was shifty or what.

5. One man came into my office with a bottle drink, which he threw into my garbage can like a basketball player throws a free throw shot. At least his aim was good.

6. Another man missed his interview appointment. He called me the following day and said that he found the street address, but for some reason every building he saw had “Suite 100” on it and he did not know which one was mine. I told him to go see his optometrist or his psychiatrist immediately for he was obviously seeing things.

There’s more, but I think you get the point. Now, I’m not trying to encourage anyone to apply for jobs at GoJet or Skybus, but if you must do so, try to be professional nevertheless. Use those types of interviews to practice for jobs you really want.

 

My favorite resume that I saw when working in an airline recruiting office was a cover letter and resume that came on blue stationary that had white clouds in the background. In the corner was a sticker of a dog jumping through a hoop.

Our interpretation was that our application process evidently made him feel like he was jumping through a hoop for a job that he was obviously over qualified for and automatically deserved. That was one of the few that was posted to a permanent position on the wall of fame...

 

Shouldn't that be the wall of shame...

 

Note To Self: Do not apply cologne to resume.

...some of those are truly unbelieveable.

Anyone else have more asinine applicant stories?

 

Recently saw a resume and cover letter that was printed on hot pink paper. That ranks up there...

 

An HR friend of mine had an applicant fail a breathalyzer (sp?) exam - even though he had been warned about it the day before. Asked why, the applicant said, "I was worried that the drug test would show that I was on cocaine."

He blew a .20 on the drunkmeter. Next.......

 

A buddy of mine and I were interviewing and one of the HR reps was clearly hitting on him. I could not believe it. He wanted to respond but didn't want to put himself in a bad spot. Later from a friend I made in HR, who knew this woman, told me that yes, this HR rep was gunning for him.

See, that Demi Moore movie could be true!

 

I have some friends that were on part of a board that was hiring teachers for an elementary school. They got one resume that was some type of puzzle that they would have had to have solved to get the guy's information. I am sure the guy was cleaver, but you don't want to play hard to get when they don't know you and have a bunch of other people in front of them, too. Next...

 

How about resumes that say, "Will only fly a jet"..........

 

Not that I've seen many, but-

Had one land in my hands from a fairly recent previous supervisor who absolutely yanked me around. This from 5 states and 500 miles away.
Tossed it- Karma Rules!

Second one was hand typed from paper edge to paper edge- top to bottom, side to side. Clearly a literal thinker, "Um, keep it to one page..."

Tossed as well.