flying international / domestic for a established / progressive / respectable regional...

I can't wait to experience the long overnights in exotic places like:ICT,VPS,MGM,MOB,GPT,HSV,HPN,BDL,ORF,LFT, etc...

Flying into those places in my new RJ. I'll polish my shoes, put the jacket, hat then calmly exit the cockpit. Make my way slowly thru the terminal a few times before heading out towards the waiting limo. Tip the driver generously for maintaining such a fine automobile before and after the trip. Get a time hack from my FO. Mention my Rolex seems to be running slow. Call the company and make sure they know - expect the replacement to be waiting for at the hotel tomorrow morning.Quickly verify 'show-time' for the evenings dinner. I presume dispatch has already made the reservations at the finest restaurant in town. Escort the FA(s) to their rooms. Walk thru the hotel making sure its going to be a safe place for 'my' crew to spend the night.

What a life! Where do I sign...

-LAFF

 

Europe or Asia! Or if you can travel back in time about 40 years, that'll work too.

 

OK Ha Ha. I get it. However when I flew in Europe I was treated pretty well. I remember, at one airline, I was treated to tickets to a show. They were in my box when I got back from a trip. When I asked my FO about them he said, "Oh yeah, the captains get things like that from time to time." Captain only! Ha Ha. I gave him the tix. (I didn't speak the language anyway).

Speaking of respect. Every time some guy gets arrested for drinking, drugs, domestic violence or something like that, I cringe. I have a feeling we will see much more of this as the airlines lower standards to attract enough pilots.

 

Don't tip the driver in Japan. It's offensive.

 

Late night in KLFT. Its 89F with 90% humidity. The Captain can't sleep and the AC isn't working...He's got a full day of golf and lunch with the CEO of Chevron, Exxon. Later that night he's going 'hunting' with the VP. He needs his rest! KLFT is one of the most exciting destinations in the world...

Captain takes a quick shower, shaves, smokes a cuban (a gift from his late poker buddy JFK) and then confidently walks down to the lobby after chaning into something appropriate for a 0230 A/C problem in hotel room. A few oil men are staggering in after a night on the town. They note the Captain , dressed in his uniform w/ hat and jacket, USAFA ring, Rolex (a gift from Che Gueverra), waiting impatiently at the front desk. The employees assure him the manager has been informed and is driving in to personally make sure his room is attended to. Before the Captain can say its not necessary to bother the manager, if someone has a few tools he can easily fix the problem himself. The oil men can't believe how rudely he's being treated. This is not how southern gentleman treat one of their own. This is certainly no way to treat a airline captain after a long 45 minute flight from Houston International. The senior oil man offers his room. The Captain can't accept the room. The FA can have the presedential suite offered by the oil man in his big hat - she deserves it...

-LAFF

 

What the heck are you talking about?

 

I think LAFF finally snapped!