Cooking For Pilots
01-02-2009 | 04:01 PM
#1
Thread Starter
With The Resistance
Joined: Jan 2006
Posts: 6,191
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From: Burning the Agitprop of the Apparat
Cooking For Pilots
Many of us who travel to Asia learn to crave a good dish with cat as a
main ingedient. Most of the catering services do a superb job with our
feline friends. It is a real joy to sample the many delicious dishes served up
in exotic back alley cafes of Shanghai and Bejing. The smoked cats hung in the neon lit
establishments are like a beacon to the gourmets amongst us.
Finding these fresh and exotic ingredients at home may pose a few problems.
With recent regulations and the skyrocketing cost of vet care, procuring the basic
ingredients is no longer as easy as a quick visit to the local ASPCA. In the spirit
of quick and easy cooking tips to those who crave the flavor of a well cooked
kitty cutlet, cat kabob, or stir fried feline- I offer the recommendation of the following
ingredients to simulate some of the better cat dishes without the fuss and
bother of fur removal and gutting.
The Sambal Oelek sauce will do for your sinuses what a cup of turbo lax did for the
bowels of that "Dumb and Dumber" guy. That raw block of spam can be fashioned
into any suitable shape or even ground into a wonderful pate. Imagine the delight of your guests
as they are told their hors d'oeurve is composed mainly of cat pate.
Bon appetit!
Next week we will take a look at how man's best friend can be plainly delicious
as we explore the third world practice of grilling a pooch over an old 55 gallon
drum in Detroit.
main ingedient. Most of the catering services do a superb job with our
feline friends. It is a real joy to sample the many delicious dishes served up
in exotic back alley cafes of Shanghai and Bejing. The smoked cats hung in the neon lit
establishments are like a beacon to the gourmets amongst us.
Finding these fresh and exotic ingredients at home may pose a few problems.
With recent regulations and the skyrocketing cost of vet care, procuring the basic
ingredients is no longer as easy as a quick visit to the local ASPCA. In the spirit
of quick and easy cooking tips to those who crave the flavor of a well cooked
kitty cutlet, cat kabob, or stir fried feline- I offer the recommendation of the following
ingredients to simulate some of the better cat dishes without the fuss and
bother of fur removal and gutting.
The Sambal Oelek sauce will do for your sinuses what a cup of turbo lax did for the
bowels of that "Dumb and Dumber" guy. That raw block of spam can be fashioned
into any suitable shape or even ground into a wonderful pate. Imagine the delight of your guests
as they are told their hors d'oeurve is composed mainly of cat pate.
Bon appetit!
Next week we will take a look at how man's best friend can be plainly delicious
as we explore the third world practice of grilling a pooch over an old 55 gallon
drum in Detroit.
Nice !
01-02-2009 | 10:57 PM
#4
Gets Weekends Off
Joined: Oct 2008
Posts: 289
Likes: 0
Screw getting your main course from the everly-stringent ASPCA. Just check out your local classifieds. Every day of the week there are multiple people giving away free kittens 'to good homes.' This is also applicable to folks who happen to have a boa constrictor who's appetite is getting a little expensive. Don't you know, it's the green thing to do because the little devils aren't going to waste!! I believe the term is 'free-cycling.' Just doing my part to help the environment.
01-03-2009 | 01:37 AM
#6
Gets Weekends Off
Joined: Nov 2008
Posts: 626
Likes: 0
From: Livin' the dream
I do like SPAM.
Please to be tell me, as I've not been privileged to try all the sundri varieties available, which one SPAM most close resembles the delicate taste of cat?
I see you have being posted a photograph of "hickory smoke" flavor SPAM. Not having much experience, okay I confess, to you my American friend, no experience with that particular variety, is that one the truly cat flavour?
I am also very much fond of Burgr King and wondering if please someone there at your facility has reicipe for flame broiled. Not Detroit sytle. Dog.
Thankr much my freedon!
Please to be tell me, as I've not been privileged to try all the sundri varieties available, which one SPAM most close resembles the delicate taste of cat?
I see you have being posted a photograph of "hickory smoke" flavor SPAM. Not having much experience, okay I confess, to you my American friend, no experience with that particular variety, is that one the truly cat flavour?
I am also very much fond of Burgr King and wondering if please someone there at your facility has reicipe for flame broiled. Not Detroit sytle. Dog.
Thankr much my freedon!
01-10-2009 | 08:45 AM
#7
Thread Starter
With The Resistance
Joined: Jan 2006
Posts: 6,191
Likes: 0
From: Burning the Agitprop of the Apparat
Well, isn't this timely and fashionable! PETA has launched a campaign to call fish "sea kittens". What a wonderful concept-unless you crave "sea cat".
From their web site(this is not a joke):
People don't seem to like fish. They're slithery and slimy, and they have eyes on either side of their pointy little heads—which is weird, to say the least. Plus, the small ones nibble at your feet when you're swimming, and the big ones—well, the big ones will bite your face off if Jaws is anything to go by.
Of course, if you look at it another way, what all this really means is that fish need to fire their PR guy—stat. Whoever was in charge of creating a positive image for fish needs to go right back to working on the Britney Spears account and leave our scaly little friends alone. You've done enough damage, buddy. We've got it from here. And we're going to start by retiring the old name for good. When your name can also be used as a verb that means driving a hook through your head, it's time for a serious image makeover. And who could possibly want to put a hook through a sea kitten?
From their web site(this is not a joke):
People don't seem to like fish. They're slithery and slimy, and they have eyes on either side of their pointy little heads—which is weird, to say the least. Plus, the small ones nibble at your feet when you're swimming, and the big ones—well, the big ones will bite your face off if Jaws is anything to go by.
Of course, if you look at it another way, what all this really means is that fish need to fire their PR guy—stat. Whoever was in charge of creating a positive image for fish needs to go right back to working on the Britney Spears account and leave our scaly little friends alone. You've done enough damage, buddy. We've got it from here. And we're going to start by retiring the old name for good. When your name can also be used as a verb that means driving a hook through your head, it's time for a serious image makeover. And who could possibly want to put a hook through a sea kitten?
01-10-2009 | 09:16 AM
#8
Gets Weekends Off
Joined: Dec 2007
Posts: 129
Likes: 0
From: in line at the ticket counter
Sea Kittens, new name same great taste!
What a bunch of idiots these people are. I just saw on another news site that they convinced some New York restaurant to let go (into the wild) their 140 year old pet lobster. On the positive side I have to think it was probably enjoyed about 5 minutes after it hit the water.
Hopefully soon someone will discover that plants can "feel" so that their won't be anything left for PETA to eat and the problem will take care of it self one way or the other.
What a bunch of idiots these people are. I just saw on another news site that they convinced some New York restaurant to let go (into the wild) their 140 year old pet lobster. On the positive side I have to think it was probably enjoyed about 5 minutes after it hit the water.
Hopefully soon someone will discover that plants can "feel" so that their won't be anything left for PETA to eat and the problem will take care of it self one way or the other.
01-12-2009 | 04:44 AM
#10
Libertarian Resistance
Joined: Feb 2007
Posts: 1,057
Likes: 0
From: 757 FO
Well, isn't this timely and fashionable! PETA has launched a campaign to call fish "sea kittens". What a wonderful concept-unless you crave "sea cat".
From their web site(this is not a joke):
People don't seem to like fish. They're slithery and slimy, and they have eyes on either side of their pointy little heads—which is weird, to say the least. Plus, the small ones nibble at your feet when you're swimming, and the big ones—well, the big ones will bite your face off if Jaws is anything to go by.
Of course, if you look at it another way, what all this really means is that fish need to fire their PR guy—stat. Whoever was in charge of creating a positive image for fish needs to go right back to working on the Britney Spears account and leave our scaly little friends alone. You've done enough damage, buddy. We've got it from here. And we're going to start by retiring the old name for good. When your name can also be used as a verb that means driving a hook through your head, it's time for a serious image makeover. And who could possibly want to put a hook through a sea kitten?
From their web site(this is not a joke):
People don't seem to like fish. They're slithery and slimy, and they have eyes on either side of their pointy little heads—which is weird, to say the least. Plus, the small ones nibble at your feet when you're swimming, and the big ones—well, the big ones will bite your face off if Jaws is anything to go by.
Of course, if you look at it another way, what all this really means is that fish need to fire their PR guy—stat. Whoever was in charge of creating a positive image for fish needs to go right back to working on the Britney Spears account and leave our scaly little friends alone. You've done enough damage, buddy. We've got it from here. And we're going to start by retiring the old name for good. When your name can also be used as a verb that means driving a hook through your head, it's time for a serious image makeover. And who could possibly want to put a hook through a sea kitten?
WAR IS PEACE
FREEDOM IS SLAVERY
IGNORANCE IS STRENGTH."
WW
