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Fun with TSA

Old 10-27-2009 | 04:23 PM
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Default Fun with TSA

I think we all have some kind of story or three about TSA and their idiocracy. Let's share.

Today, day 1 of 4, I arrive at the airport lugging my overnight bag, laptop, and a cooler bag thing with my food for a few days in it.

TSA wants to rescan my lunch bux. Ok.

After the second scan, the guy behind the screen asks "Are those chicken sandwiches?"

"Yes..." I replied.

"Oh, ok." He siad.

Immediately thereafter, I realized that something was odd. I also had a blue ice bag of frozen mystery goo in the lunchbox, so I asked the TSA agent "Was it the ice pack thing that looked suspicious?"

"No, I saw some sandwiches, and they didn't look like hamburgers or sandwiches really, so I thought they might be chicken sandwiches."

They seriously scanned my bag twice in order to find out what kind of sandwich I had in my lunch box.
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Old 10-27-2009 | 05:56 PM
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In SAN, my (then) 4 year old daughter was taken aside to secondary for frisking. I could see her in the back area standing with her arms extended getting wanded up and down her clothes. She is such a chatty kid it didn't seem to bother her. If that were me, I would have been petrified.

Anyway, I thought that was a bit much.

Earlier this year I was body scanned in DEN. My only consolation is that there is a TSA agent in Denver clawing their own eyes out.
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Old 10-27-2009 | 06:12 PM
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Check meganslaw for that TSA agent lol


Originally Posted by peteq
In SAN, my (then) 4 year old daughter was taken aside to secondary for frisking. I could see her in the back area standing with her arms extended getting wanded up and down her clothes. She is such a chatty kid it didn't seem to bother her. If that were me, I would have been petrified.

Anyway, I thought that was a bit much.

Earlier this year I was body scanned in DEN. My only consolation is that there is a TSA agent in Denver clawing their own eyes out.
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Old 10-28-2009 | 09:13 AM
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Originally Posted by peteq
In SAN, my (then) 4 year old daughter was taken aside to secondary for frisking. I could see her in the back area standing with her arms extended getting wanded up and down her clothes. She is such a chatty kid it didn't seem to bother her. If that were me, I would have been petrified.

Anyway, I thought that was a bit much.

Earlier this year I was body scanned in DEN. My only consolation is that there is a TSA agent in Denver clawing their own eyes out.

What better place to hide something than on a small child who people would not consider a threat.
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Old 10-28-2009 | 11:27 AM
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While going through security somewhere with my crew I overheard someone getting a 'bag check'. The TSA was holding a 1 qt. baggie with bottles of liquids in it.. one of them was larger than 3.4oz.

The TSA guy said "This one here, this is bigger than the maximum which is 3.4 ounces. The next guy might not let that slide but I'll let it go this time."

I'm glad everything is standardized.
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Old 10-28-2009 | 12:04 PM
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I work the ramp, and bring lunch with me everyday.

Small unopened can of baked beans? They won't let it through. Empty 100% of contents of small can in to same sized small tupperware container? Your beans are no longer a security threat. True.

Small unopened apple sauce pack? They won't let it through. Empty 100% of contents of small apple sauce pack in to same sized small tupperware container? Your apple sauce is no longer a security threat. Also true.

Do you see where I'm going with this? I cannot stand the TSA for numerous reasons.

As a whole, they are the most unprofessional, poorly trained, inconsistent, and deservedly disrespected group of 'security personnel' in our country. I hate that I have to contribute to their paychecks.
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Old 10-28-2009 | 12:56 PM
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TSA = Tupperware Sales Associates.
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Old 10-29-2009 | 02:33 AM
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Did your sandwich have more than three ounces of mustard on it?

http : // www . talkairline. com /phpmotion/play.php?vid=440

Last edited by Spike from flyi; 10-29-2009 at 02:54 AM.
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Old 10-29-2009 | 07:12 PM
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When I was interning for an airline a few years back, I was non-revving from SAN to LAX. Usually, I didn't need to have a boarding pass since my company ID badge would let me through. Once in line, the TSA lady (had to be fresh out of high school) looked at my badge and said, "I think you need a boarding pass."

I said, "You think I do? Well, do you think I should go and get one?"

"Well, your badge doesn't say 'Flight Crew' on it, so I think you need a pass. I'll have to ask my manager."

She didn't budge. "So, are you going to ask him now or do you still think I need one?"

She says, "Naw, you can go ahead. But I think you'll need one next time."

"Ok, I think I'll get one next time," as I strolled right through. She was completely oblivious.

It was a company badge, no SIDA.
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Old 10-29-2009 | 07:35 PM
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turkey sandwich..............
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