Genius American Public
#21
Gets Weekends Off
Joined APC: Jul 2006
Position: Groundlooped and liking it
Posts: 266
Seriously?
Plenty of brilliant flight attendant quotes;
Me: Hmmmmmmm.....I think the internet is down, my laptop isn't connecting here (sitting in the terminal)
Her: ......wow......................................... ...you think that's worldwide?
FA: Um, not a big deal but there's a hole in the plane, I've seen it before, just thought you should know.
CA: (after he goes back during boarding to look) You realize the cabin door is open, right?
Me: Hmmmmmmm.....I think the internet is down, my laptop isn't connecting here (sitting in the terminal)
Her: ......wow......................................... ...you think that's worldwide?
FA: Um, not a big deal but there's a hole in the plane, I've seen it before, just thought you should know.
CA: (after he goes back during boarding to look) You realize the cabin door is open, right?
#22
I always love after a long leg during a quick turn and the plane is all boarded up when you make your way to the back of the aircraft to "relieve" yourself and you get all these blank stares. It's almost as if they are shocked that you are using the lav as if there is no way pilots have bodily functions. I almost feel like saying "Yeah!! Pilots are human and gotta pee too." Kind of reminds me of looking into a stall full of goats, just staring at you like they have never seen a human before.
#23
When I was jumpseating back to work, I boarded first because I wanted to introduce myself to the crew. I took my seat and they started boarding the passengers. One of the passengers asked me, "Aren't you supposed to be in the front of the plane?" I told her that the FAA was doing an experiment on psycho-kinetic energy and I was flying the plane using the power of my mind.
PoK
PoK
#24
For starters, understand if you're standing within 5' of a gate, you're instantly a gate agent....
While waiting at the gate with the rest of my crew, a woman comes up and asks, "Is this the gate for flight 3833 to Pensacola?" I turn around, look at the big screen that says "Gate B15: AA 3833 - PENSACOLA, FL" in 6" high BOLD letters, and say, "Uh, yes ma'am, it is." Then she asks, "Oh ok have we began boarding yet?" I (in a very obvious manner) look at the closed jet bridge door beneath the "B15" sign, look outside at the empty ramp, look at the other 46 or so passengers patiently waiting, and say, "No, ma'am, but we will start shortly after the plane arrives." "Ok thank you!"
If this doesn't happen 3 times a week it happens a hundred.
While waiting at the gate with the rest of my crew, a woman comes up and asks, "Is this the gate for flight 3833 to Pensacola?" I turn around, look at the big screen that says "Gate B15: AA 3833 - PENSACOLA, FL" in 6" high BOLD letters, and say, "Uh, yes ma'am, it is." Then she asks, "Oh ok have we began boarding yet?" I (in a very obvious manner) look at the closed jet bridge door beneath the "B15" sign, look outside at the empty ramp, look at the other 46 or so passengers patiently waiting, and say, "No, ma'am, but we will start shortly after the plane arrives." "Ok thank you!"
If this doesn't happen 3 times a week it happens a hundred.
#25
Gets Weekends Off
Joined APC: Jun 2006
Position: Former EMB 120 Jr. Water Boy, CRJ newbee
Posts: 373
When I was jumpseating back to work, I boarded first because I wanted to introduce myself to the crew. I took my seat and they started boarding the passengers. One of the passengers asked me, "Aren't you supposed to be in the front of the plane?" I told her that the FAA was doing an experiment on psycho-kinetic energy and I was flying the plane using the power of my mind.
PoK
PoK
#29
#30
"Yes, and I'm here to frisk you............"
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