Ladies and gentleman I have some good news and bad news. We are about to crash. The good news is we are making good time to the crash site and should be there shortly. In fact we should beat the rescue vehicles there buy a good margin. For those going outside after arrival it will be a warm 110 degrees in the the sun being as we are arriving near death valley!
Oh yea and classic far side. Oh no we are all going to die the low fuel light is on... oh that is the PA.
Oh yea and classic far side. Oh no we are all going to die the low fuel light is on... oh that is the PA.
Quote:
"Ya know, I really can't believe (insert Chief Pilot, Manager of Crew Scheduling, Director of Ops, any Management Pilot) makes us fly when we try to call in fatigue. I can barely see the instruments right now. I heard he deletes all the company records whenever someone tries to do it just so there's never any proof."
That way...just in case something does happen....
Haha, just make sure you say it at least every half hour so it doesn't get deleted!Originally Posted by SharkyBN584
Got this from a captain a couple months ago. One day while you're in cruise look right at the guy next to you and say:"Ya know, I really can't believe (insert Chief Pilot, Manager of Crew Scheduling, Director of Ops, any Management Pilot) makes us fly when we try to call in fatigue. I can barely see the instruments right now. I heard he deletes all the company records whenever someone tries to do it just so there's never any proof."
That way...just in case something does happen....
"Gee, you sure have a purty mouth..."
My buddy told me about why his flight was late....
"Ladies and Gentlemen, Good morning from the flight deck. It will be a couple more minutes until pushback as my F/O has just informed me that Burger King in Concourse B got his order wrong and he'll be back in a jiffy."
"Ladies and Gentlemen, Good morning from the flight deck. It will be a couple more minutes until pushback as my F/O has just informed me that Burger King in Concourse B got his order wrong and he'll be back in a jiffy."
Ladies and Gentlemen, the right wing is not on fire.
Over the PA
Captain to the first officer: Do you have a gum or piece of mint? I want get the alcohol smell out of my breath
First officer: try coffee it works for me
Captain to the first officer: Do you have a gum or piece of mint? I want get the alcohol smell out of my breath
First officer: try coffee it works for me
Quote:
HaOriginally Posted by insanelyradical
Ladies and Gentlemen, the right wing is not on fire.
Here's the rest of that one.
http://youtube.com/watch?v=YEIB4baOSd8
"Welcome aboard flight 1234 with non-stop service halfway to cleveland."
Or the easiest way to clear out a Saab/Dash/Beech/ATR:
"For those of you who have never flown on a prop plane before, rest assured, there haven't really been all that many incidents of the propeller blades flinging off of the hub and through the cabin, especially not when you consider the tremendous stress those things are under. I'm amazed they stay on at all, to be honest. I checked ours, though, and only one of them was a little bit wiggly, so we should be fine."
Or the easiest way to clear out a Saab/Dash/Beech/ATR:
"For those of you who have never flown on a prop plane before, rest assured, there haven't really been all that many incidents of the propeller blades flinging off of the hub and through the cabin, especially not when you consider the tremendous stress those things are under. I'm amazed they stay on at all, to be honest. I checked ours, though, and only one of them was a little bit wiggly, so we should be fine."
Quote:
Or the easiest way to clear out a Saab/Dash/Beech/ATR:
"For those of you who have never flown on a prop plane before, rest assured, there haven't really been all that many incidents of the propeller blades flinging off of the hub and through the cabin, especially not when you consider the tremendous stress those things are under. I'm amazed they stay on at all, to be honest. I checked ours, though, and only one of them was a little bit wiggly, so we should be fine."
Originally Posted by plasticpi
"Welcome aboard flight 1234 with non-stop service halfway to cleveland."Or the easiest way to clear out a Saab/Dash/Beech/ATR:
"For those of you who have never flown on a prop plane before, rest assured, there haven't really been all that many incidents of the propeller blades flinging off of the hub and through the cabin, especially not when you consider the tremendous stress those things are under. I'm amazed they stay on at all, to be honest. I checked ours, though, and only one of them was a little bit wiggly, so we should be fine."
LOL only one wiggly ha
