So for something new and to get a few laughs, what is the weirdest thing that you have seen while working? It can be anything! Anything from weather, to passengers, to ATC, to Captains or First Officers do strange things, etc... I think it would be great to get some laughs during this low time in our industry to maybe help boost moral a little.

 

2 things come to mind:

During flt CPT goes to lav (CRJ700). He comes back and I don't notice anything unusual. We land and all pax are gone except 1 lady assembling her kids stroller in the jetway. As the CPT and I walk past her (I was in front of the CPT so I didn't see it yet) she starts laughing histerically. CPT had a 2 ft long train of TP stuck to his foot. I still don't know how it stayed there from the time he finished his "deposit" to departing the plane. Damn funny though.

When I was new in the 121 world I briefly forgot about the concept of physics (pressure specifically). I had a yogurt from the hotel in the morning and went to eat it at FL390. Luckily when I opened it the seal was broken towards the CPT. He was wearing most of my strawberry yogurt and was quite ****ed. Of course I started making all sorts of off color jokes and he started laughing as well. Since then I avoid yogurt at altitude.

 

I've met a guy who was bringing back a can of beer in his suitcase from an international layover (I think it was Dakar or Cape Town...somewhere over there). Sometime during the flight, the beer exploded in the suitcase. Everyone was asking why he was reeking like beer while he was trying to catch his commute flight home.

 

I was jumpseating to PHX. The look on the passengers' faces was priceless when myself and another jumpseater in uniform left the cockpit inflight at the same time on a A-320. He took a dump and I hung out in the galley for ablout 15 minutes chatting with an FA. "oh these new planes really do fly themselves!"


It was even better when we pretended we locked ourselves out of the cockpit

 

After takeoff and climbing through 10,000 the captain pulled out his bagpipe and started jamming out. I was asleep by FL230.. It was very soothing!

 

lol that story is way funny.

This one's not as funny...but one time, the capt and I ate a pretty bad breakfast at this one hotel. (I guess the eggs were rotten or something, but it created chaos in our stomachs)

So, while in flight, he says...."Hey....I think I'm gonna go use the lav."
I said, "Really? I was just about to say the same thing." He then says, "yeah.....I really need to go now, though." I said, ok...

So he went, but we both had forgotten that the forward lav was inop in that particular plane. Right away after he got back, I needed to go do my business, also...but then he reminded me, "umm...yeah...remember the forward lav's not working."

So I guess we both ended up doing the walk of shame right after another...

Well, right as I had walked half-way down, this old man gets up like from the second to last row to use the bathroom, and the FA immediately gets up and tells him to have a seat while grabbing him from the shoulder, lol....and then makes an announcement.

I felt bad for the old man, but I REALLY needed to go, and it's probably a good idea for the pilots to be comfortable lol.

The look on the pax's faces were priceless as they saw pilot after pilot walking all the way back to the rear lav to do our stuff...hehehehehe.......

 

I assume you mean just the Chanter. I can't imagine anyone sleeping a few feet away from a good set o' pipes.

 

From my single pilot days (pax sitting in the right seat):

Male pax urinated in his coffee cup.

Flight nurse poked me with a syringe (thankfully, she hadn't leaded it yet).

A few times each year had someone who was so terrified they would cover their head with a jacket (like a little kid hiding under the covers).

 

I'm an ag guy so I don't get to go to exotic layovers and the such.....But, I was out one day in my trusty old Ag Cat and flew over a rock trailer parked by a house and inside was a young, buck naked lady getting her tan on. I flew over several times and she started waving to me. I called my other guys on the radio and soon there were several of us just flying in circles above this woman. She never flinched.

 

You forgot to mention the part about how you happened to have your camera with you...