evrbodysmugglin

You got to watch those HK wives. If they squirrel away that donation dollars they will show up in the great PNW at your abode and be like. Hi! My name is Kitty. I your husbands wife from HK. Can be hard to play that one off. But you can always blame it on the stuff from Dank’s wonder emporium she must have got ahold of some 22% couch locker and was confused

Geezer

We def met at Bryson's at one time or t other.
Can't remember the last time I was there but I wanted a tall boy Busch in a slim paper sack and all they had was eff'n PBR. I turned out and shook the sand off my feet as I left. Twas' a time when a good host and proprietor stocked up for his best customers. Man, do you remember those *****in' double shorted secondaries? That's a memry that deserves a Snoot a what Snoop says'll fix me up.

Why are they called the Lesser Antilles anyway? They looked pretty great after comin outta Cayenne with just a briefcase load and a for Sh#t Martin 404 with a mock Air Bahamas logo applied with a paint brush. I hear there's pretty good money smugglin Chorinea amazon outta Peru (and not the one in Nebraska) for the elites in NYC now a days.

Locke

Can’t say how many will make it, but the company knows you’re out flying. They’ll leave a message and you can call back when you’re on the ground.

Geezer

You should ask on another thread. I think one operator highly favored at present has a special ACARS chime that sounds like a few bars of the Coca Cola jingle. Hear that and you have a class date.

Geezer

2 out of 3 times 1 out of 3 ave8tors that aren't even on the printable senioity list will show up with the Samsonite "Brobigangian" travel boot locker/curio cabinet. The Brobigangian is unique in it's ability to completely fill any space made available on crew transport cars or vans. If you are following a crew van that has a Gulliverian traveler on board you will be able to recognoze this because you'll see evry other occupants of the car's crew gear in the rear window sliding around and falling on someones head. If the crew transport has a hatchback and is parked you'll know that a Brobigangian bag is on board because you'll notice that it's a two person job to open the hatchback in order to unload the crew equipment. The process is a multi-step process that requires one person to slowly open the lift door as another stick one arm inside to keep at least one persons bag from crashing to the ground when the door is fully opened. Somebody's bag falls to the tarmac in every case, regardless of the dexterity that us used in the process. Scientist are studying the contents of the Brobigangian bags contents and have described it as a Tesseract-like form that contains everything-except personal hygene products.
The data set is still being compiled on one other denizen of the good ship Kayfour. This payroll number may or may not have the Brobigangian as their go to travel suite. Easily recognized by the Brogans with soles as thick as Madonna's faux British accent. He will be the person that has the unique ability to time his entry and egress from his duty station exactly as the occupant of the crew bunk room falls asleep. Kicking the crew door every time as he does so as to announce to the occupants of the bunk room- rest well good bro I am here no need to worry. This worthy gent also requires an detailed explanation of aircraft right and left terminology when discussing which rear bunks will be used by whom. Needless to say he'll anounce his entry into the incorrect bunk with a "sorry bro". If the FME and Load Master have bunks and are sleeping this is the fellow who will never learn how not to turn on all the crew lighting when entering the sweet abode of where some seek to slip into the arms of Morpheous. Ignorant of his misdeeds he will always fall asleep with loud snores and odefourous out gassings. Thus another constant- the least useful sleeps best. Or the least useful is the most rested.
Finally, if you haven't seen the shoes or baggage of a fellow crew member you can tell that he has the Brobigangian luggage and Brogans of clunk when he ends his crew turnover briefing while in CONUS airspace with- "We are not CPDLC".

Surprisingly enough absolutely no data is available on crew members that wear cowboy boots. I suspect Princeton and Harvard have run out of Post-Docs to carry out any further research.

If you are more interested in footwear, some fine examples of what not to wear can be viewed at "Boot Barn" (nasdaq BOOT) and ShoeCarnival (nasdaq SCVL).

Geezer

When I posted the names of the two footwear establishments in the previous post I didn't think it necessary to add the www. at the beginning or the .com at the end. The editing window is closed and since I have received several private messages subsequently from concerned Kayforians that some might not be aware of the format for viewing indexed items on the world wide web I've made that information available now, in this post.

in compo mentis
French Castle

(If you're using TOR or Linux I think the indexing standard remains the same)

(I'm pretty sure you'll only get cool dom/fetish shoes sites on your Tinder feed if you go to legit shoe sites)

If you are the reasons the FME's post signs of the likes of "your mom doesn't live here" or "S#^T once flush twice" then I'll make the world wide web indexing standard more easily understood. If you want to visit an indexed web site type www.nameofestablishment.com

Any references made to the works of a noted Irish satirist (as opposed to a Kayfourian Satyrist) are purely coincidental and do not mean that I am in favor of literally taking the advice of the above noted satirists advice in his "A Modest Proposal" Nor do any references to the noted "Papa Don't Preach" singers works mean that I advocate wearing pink pull over hats.

And for the grammar guru's I now it's NASDAQ not nasdaq. I was inundated by PM's about that too.

Geezer

Okay, okay, I have received so many PM's I need to address them. I'll start from the most annoying to the least annoying and use the total number of, in a Ven diagram I had to make, total ALL CAPS, special characters, "bolds", underlines, and bold underlines as the starting point.

1) Yeah, yeah, I know that referencing an Anglo-Irish author is probably more suitable to pprune.

2) Fedex dudes chillaxe. I know that "The Bear" by Faulkner is quintessential Americana and has just as many references to weights measures, and etc., but don't wear your hearts on your sleeves. I don't like American Gothic lit. I propose a compromise. In the future I'll try to limit literary references to "A Good Man Is Hard to Find" by Flannery O'Connor. This should be regional enough and modern enough to allow for the Navy/Marine, DALPA/FEDEX crowd.

3) Tindersoulsole- You make me blush. The thread you propose would get shut down very quickly. T83flter takes the Mods thing pretty seriously and if AirH@SS gets involved it would get pretty ugly.

4) HeavyMetuhl- i was just kidding about the handle change and Chimmiwhatever was cool. But this isn't freshman Eng 101 at Brown, so it would be way to trope-y and trite to call the denizens of the upper deck residents of the "Glass Menagerie". I get it- you like Tenn. williams.

5) grammargrammar- yes the misspellings were intentional. It's called establishing verisimilitude. I'd suggest you reference White's "Elements of Style".

6) kidrok- yes i did know that Mark Wahlberg was Marky Mark.

7) And for everyone that thinks "Fight Club" is such a cool flick full of like metaphors and analogies.... Whatever. Grow up. Read Proust or something already.

pilotlyfe

Hi Everyone,

I know it states that you need jet time on the job page but will turboprop time do? I have Metro and 1900 time. Just around 2500tt with about 1000 pic in the Metro. No degree.

Thanks in advance for any responses.

No Land 3

We have a ton of Turboprop guys who's first jet was the 747, granted many of them have a mil background. I'd suggest your TT is lower than what is competitive unless you are mil. Put an app in, because none of us really know what gets their attention. One new hire was finishing up his IOE, he was a 777 CA flying for Etihad. This is who you are competing with to get a class date, let alone an interview.

Geezer

The commonality of routes is inversely proportionate to the ICAO identifiers that begin with V or Z and L or N. It works like this, if you have seniority you'll go to Bangladesh if you're on probation you'll go to Tahiti.

The math is similar to the 2 year FO pay 4 year Capt. pay matrix. The 2 year FO gets 120 hours of pay credit and the 3 year Capt. gets 64 hours of pay credit. Easy-peasy when you master 1224 math.

Both get the double crew but one only works 1/4 of the flight the other works 1/1 of the flight.

And the seat warmer will.....ooopsie..... eat the crew entree clearly marked with a waterproof marker CAPT.