Actually, it makes a sound, but not a noise. Noise is something that must be perceived and determined, subjectively, to by noisy. A sound, on the other hand, is an attribute.

if there is a computer with APC in the woods, and Shy gets on it, will a bear sh*t on him?

Shy = noise
Mozart = sound

That's quite funny!

Editor's note: While there are quite a few points that Shy has made that I agree with, this is still funny, given the nature of the discussion!

Dear ShyGuy,

I went from flying a 260-seat 767 to a 150-seat airbus. Did my skillz really decrease by 57%? What can I do to make up for both reduction of skillz and not flying a large aircraft anymore (to compensate for my manhood)?

Is there a more effective way of communicating to the crappy regional pilots walking through the terminal that I'm better than them other than just refusing eye contact? During the summer I don't have my double breasted coat so it's not as obvious how superior I am.

Yours truly,

80

^^^^ well said ^^^^

Well, in this case, since you were flying a 767, you had the appropriate higher skills. Now flying a 150 seater Airbus, in your case, those higher skills are dormant. They are still there, but not used. As for regional guys, the double breasted jacket should be good enough. But in summer, just walk in your normal pilot uniform without the jacket. You'll be obviously clean and dry. Bigger airplane APUs do a good job. Because the regional guys will be sweating in their shirts with broken APUs. Or an APU that works on a CRJ200 but one still sweats because the APU air is pathetic. So these guys will be obvious to spot based on their perspiration and not-so-clean shirts. Another giveaway is the backpack, although present at a slight level at majors, the majority of backpacks are at the regional pilot level. So when you see them, ask them "how was math class?". We'll establish we were better because we aren't dressed like we are reporting to 9th grade algebra class. And the last and best way is to act like a upper class HPN passenger. If they try and talk to you, hold your head up high and say "we don't talk to regional hired help.". That should establish our superiority over these puddle jumpers.

Shy you forgot that if you truly want to be a better pilot. Or at least a delta pilot you must request "wind checks" and you must yell at everyone on guard...

Funny you mention about guard... I always hear people yelling at others on guard, but have not once flown with a DL pilot who jumps on others on guard.

Yet, even on guard, whoever it is will mention about delta pilots jumping on them. I'm pretty sure it's very likely other parties convincing themselves of what they believe to be true.

The only thing I've ever done on guard is confirm that the offending party's gate is occupied. :)


Speaking of, I heard a hilarious back and forth recently with a UA flight in EWR asking for MX at their gate. Totally uninterrupted, the guard troll assured them that they had their problem noted and will be right out.

All good things, shy.

I particularly like the last portion. My issue is that I don't really want to be bothered with any pleasantries with the help, but they need to know just how low they are. Excellent advice.

I'm also pleased to know that said skillz are simply dormant. I'll have to relay that to the ladies before I disappoint them yet again.